/int/ – No shittings during wörktime
„There is no place like home“

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No. 32319 Systemkontra
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Old died
No. 32321
I'm mostly ironic about it myself. Still, the government gave us four day-offs, and day-offs are always nice.
No. 32323
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Coincidentally, today the greedy landlord had to give me a cheque in the post for a few hundred pounds because of new legislation on deposits.
No. 32324
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Another blow stuck against the oligarchs :D.

I saw a turtle digging this nest yesterday. Don't worry, I didn't approach, but gave her privacy to finish working and then went out to the spot for this pic. It doesn't look like much, but there are tiny eggs buried in there somewhere. I was never close enough to the mother to identify the species, but she wasn't one of the large ones-the nest itself is only about a foot or so long. I should note that it isn't set in a random patch of grass, but there is a small wooded area just off frame and a pond about 30 yards away.
No. 32326
Today I don't need to go in to work as far as I'm aware and so I'm probably going to try staying in and not wasting any of my time. I've got food and I've got smokes so there's really no legitimate need to go anywhere today, although it also means I have to pick something up tomorrow. I'm also just about out of candy. I've been on a real candy spending spree ever since I bought all those useless overpriced bags for Halloween kids who never showed up so maybe I'll just go out and buy another like $10 or so worth of candy from walmart but it's not like I don't also have candy apples and ice cream still floating around.

Relatedly I heard this rumor that the inventor of minecraft is now some kind of a billionaire and spends all of his money on candy. Is this true? It always saddens me to hear such things, although considering the type of person maybe their lack of ambition in doing anything but wasting money on stupid shit is a good thing so they can cause less harm. Each time someone wins the lottery I think the same thing about something like Iran shooting down a $100 million drone or how much each bomb costs and can't help but think to myself man I could do so much more with those kinds of resources than the stupid shit my government and rich oligarch kids or lottery winners or whoever are doing with it. It's just like, what a complete waste of resources. We have all these resources opened up to us in this technological highly populous age and that's all people can think of doing with it is buying another useless sports car.

But I'm one to talk. I am considering wasting more time and money on candy and games after all.
No. 32328
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Over the last week I started working more engaged on a paper I need to finish until mid January. Today I read two texts and one is quite handy, I even took some notes tho taking more will be necessary.
I will try to find out in this paper in what way Adorno uses the concept of the masses, in what way it stays with mass/crowd topoi from 19th and early 20th century cultural critique and in what way it differs from that. So far I can just say that Adorno has a different take on the masses, he shows how they are made, it's a result and yet he refrains how the masses or the mass of rationalized and normalized individuals still is unconscious and not autonomous as it should be. So the mass for him is indeed similar to the phantasms of the 19th century, it is a (vague) concept to explain something about the process of modernity which might be equal to the civilizing process described in the Dialectic of Enlightenment still need to read the chapters that come before the on the cultural industry. And yet what he does different is that he actually explains how the mass is engendered and he does not just hate the masses because of a supposed substance that belongs to the mass as such. But, again, the engendered mass has the similar qualities has diagnosed in the conservative critique in the 100 years before Adornos text from 1944.
No. 32329
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Today was relatively good.
Found a small volume of Joyce's poetry up for the taking.

My external HDD is acting up, so I'm going to compress my music and literature folders and put it up in the cloud to be safe.
Never knew I had 40 gigs of music saved. It's not that it'd be hard to re-download, but rather, hard to re-discover.
On the contrary, some of the pdfs and epubs would be a pain in the ass to find again.
God, my cloud folder is disorganised. At least it has some dates.
Apparently I published my first Hungarian subtitles on September 2017.
First thing I ever put on the internet that "I made".

Picked up those old magazines I found online.
Somebody took really good care of them. Most issues even have the little "how to subscribe" and opinion questionnaire in it.
Reminds me of old Soviet Progress Publishers volumes with their "Request to readers!" parts where they encouraged you to send in your opinion on their publications.
It's kind of like a time capsule.
Still kind of curious as to how this ended up here.
Sometimes I wonder what will happen to my collection once I'm gone.
Will my family keep it, or will it be sold and disassembled for pennies on the dollar?

Still have two ~200 word essays to write for tomorrow. Haven't read any of the necessary text. If I remember it's just "Read these two textbook chapters, compare their viewpoints, and then write a short piece in favour of one or the other"

Got a text from the girl. She wants me to help her prepare for her exams.
We talked extensively about a novel today.
Basically just said yes to tutoring her.

Honestly, something feels off. I'm tired, yet I'm really talkative. Overly talkative, and my mouth is loose, saying whatever passes through my mind.
For example, I'm very close to being thrown out of the library, because I called the dumb, lazy whore working there petty and kleinbürgerlich.
Reality is incredibly petty sometimes.
No. 32342
200 words isn't an essay mate. I kind of remember having to write those little entries back in school and how much I'd often put it off til the last minute. And by last minute I really do mean like starting it an hour before class. Come to think of it I really was an awful student.

Anyways so why did Soviet publishers request responses? That just seems really odd to me.
No. 32343
No idea. But Progress volumes were usually made to appeal to foreign readers interested in the Soviet Union. It was sort of an "outreach programme" and I guess they wanted to fine tune the readability and quality of their volumes.
(Thought they also published Foreign language volumes for school use. I have on of those. Ironically it collects 19th century American writer.)

>200 words isn't an essay mate
Aye. I just couldn't really find a better word for it.
No. 32358
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I think I need at least one more week to catch up with stuff.

Let's hope that everyone is so terribly prepared for tomorrow, that we talk about basic shit for brainlets and I get one extra week to read Hamlet.
Because I only finished the first fucking act.
It's a really good book. I feel it. Though the new translation I picked is unarguably less poetic than the one we treat as the standard.

Still one more of these 200 word texts to write.
Feels like I've achieved nothing besides alienating people, spending money, and putting out fires.
Never noticed the textbook quotes a Tibetan poem.

The fact that I'm organising my writings and archives makes me feel like I'm subconsciously preparing for death, weirdly enough.
No. 32362
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mom put winter comforter on my beda
No. 32366
>mom put winter comforter on my beda
Speaking of winter, today was the first day of snow
Winter has begun.
No. 32367
37 celsius here today. Feels summer man.
No. 32368
fugging snow already melted
sun is shining
No. 32371 Kontra
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turn off the heater :DDD

are you serious?
No. 32373
When I hear such things, I imagine that all world southern than me is already Mad Max/dune desert. What you give as presents to christmas? Sand?
No. 32374
No, looks like he lied, max british temperature now is +8 in south.
No. 32375
Isn’t that like 98F... what the fug
No. 32376
It's probably the Aussie. He's been radically reintegrated into the Commonwealth, it seems. Britannia rules the waves 'n' stuff.
No. 32380
Correct. It's now 2300 and has cooled down to a pleasant 27 :-DDD
No. 32385
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Waited three weeks for a VESA mount for my old monitor to get here from China, only to find it doesn't even fit.
No. 32386
I went to a Tallinn cruise today, to get tax-free smokes for my mother. The tax here is 6€/pack, so even taking a mind-numbingly boring trip you save hundreds at best. Very bydlo but what can you do.
No. 32387
No. 32388
I wouldn't call saving money a bydlo thing. Yeah, bydlos can be penny pinchers and quite niggardly, but whatever they save on buying subpar quality products, they immediately blow on luxury things they can't actually afford.
So go and save that money without any shame.
No. 32390
Thanks Ernst, being a kid from a poor family penny-pinching is in my genes.
No. 32392
When you already build bridge to Tallin? I really looking forward for this project.
No. 32395
The undersea railroad project has stalled due bickering about where it starts, Helsinki or Espoo.
No. 32397
Nah, I only order chinkshit from ebay because of the good returns policy. Last time I ordered an electric knife sharpener that broke instantly and I got a full refund despite the seller's pleas of "we are smarru famiry company, prease accept 50% refund".
No. 32401
Today was less terrible than I imagined it to be.
Basically nothing happened. I read Hamlet in half of my free time, in the other half I talked to people.

Literature classes went well. This week we only talked about grammar, so as I expected, there one more week to read.
Turns out I only had to write on of those 200 word texts, so I stayed up for naught to write the second one.

Parents left for the weekend. Left some money, so I'm going to order pizza tomorrow.
Somehow my sister got hold of a genuine bag of Amerigan doritos. She was considerate enough to share it with me without even asking for it.
I didn't even know about it, but she still shared.
Isn't family nice?
No. 32404
I have sunk to a new low.
For a few days now I've been heating the tea water in the microwave oven instead of a kettle. I feel like a total degenerate.
No. 32420
How did you enjoy your Doritos?
They're a very low-tier snack food, IMO, and nothing like real tortilla chips. If it isn't made with nixtamalized corn (=treated with basic solution, like almost all corn products in Mexico/Central America), it's just a corn chip, a fundamentally inferior food.

If you ever get your hands on some Takis, those are the real shit.

Get some Doritos to snack on and you're basically an American.
No. 32424
what the fugg man I'm freezing my balls of pouring coal into the stove like a madman
oh that explains it :DDD
I remember once or twice heating the tea water on the stove, alongside the stove-fan but that was when the power was out, you degenerate
No. 32425
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>heating the tea water in the microwave oven instead of a kettle.
That's how it starts, and then before you know it you're stirring instant tea into water from the tap :^DD. I grew up drinking that stuff every Summer, alongside Kool-Aid and Country Time Lemonade powder. Good times.
No. 32427
Coal stove is ebun. I remember having the smell linger in the car for maybe half a week or so after bringing home a couple of sacks from the shop.
t. had a multiburner in New Zealand
No. 32435
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I ordered Kool Aid from the US in my late teens, there are some Germans from the US, who sell American groceries on German ebay. I really really liked cherry watermelon, but blueberry e.g. was kinda disgusting, don't know what other flavors I ordered but besides cherry watermelon I was disappointed. I like the taste of artificial cherry and watermelon tho.
Generally US food is hit or miss. Poptarts can be good but they have mostly been a disappointment too. Choco with peanutbutter is great, some bars are excellent, others are crappy. Soft drinks are usually tasty tho.
No. 32444
I must say it was quite good. It was spicy sweet Chili flavoured.
It wasn't really spicy or anything, but I could see myself eating a bag of this.

I had powder based tea a few times, and it always had a weird, off putting taste.

>Generally US food is hit or miss
This. I had American chocolate a few times, and that's borderline inedible.
No. 32450 Kontra
>I had American chocolate a few times, and that's borderline inedible.

Reese is alright and the Butterfinger or the Oh Henry bar as well. Hersehy has a lot of choco products and I think I was rather skeptical about it. The problem with Poptarts e.g was they weren't really tasting after chocolate.
No. 32468
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I'm glad eBay resellers are ensuring the free flow of regional consumer treasures :D.
I'm not surprised you liked the cherry watermelon-with Kool-Aid, their red flavors are usually the best. I know it's all artificial coloring, but that's still a decent guideline when picking from unfamilar varieties.

>it always had a weird, off putting taste.
It definitely doesn't taste like real brewed tea, but when I was a kid all that mattered was that it was sweet. For pure flavor, the best powdered drink imo was always Tang. We rarely had that, though.
As far as American chocolate, Dove is a pretty decent brand.

One of my favorites.
No. 32473
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Today was good. Read another act from Hamlet, took notes, added some quotations from the English and definitive Hungarian translations, had lunch, and then slept.
Then I had lunch and had a siesta.
After waking up I finished my playtrough of Postal Redux on Hard and listened to some Chinese post-rock albums youtube keeps recommending me.
Just had dinner. My sister made me a grilled cheese sandwich.
Didn't even knew she can actually cook. I'm the one who usually does the cooking when we're alone.

I'm feeling a little sick. My nose is running. Turns out I turned off the heating in the room again.
I'll probably read a bit and then go to bed early.

I had both Hersey's and the Reese's cups, but they were both terrible.
Though that's just my opinion.

Then your family used tea differently.
We use tea as a supplement for meals.
For example, a bit of warm, sugary tea greatly enhances breakfast, because it's simple carbs.
While something that's just sweet would just trick your body.
No. 32474
>I must say it was quite good. It was spicy sweet Chili flavoured.
Then I almost want to say that you haven't had the genuine product. The two canonical flavors are nacho cheese and cool ranch (based on ranch sauce). Every other flavor is a temporary fad that they shift in and out every few years.

I'm surprised anybody who didn't grow up with them likes poptarts. There's a half-baked blandness to the dough and artificialness to the filling that is nostalgic for me, but which I can recognize as objectively off-putting. Non-fruit flavors tend to be the best though.

Indeed, Butterfinger is probably our greatest snackbar. Can't even think of one that comes close.
No. 32475
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Is there no flavour that's just "ranch"?
No. 32479
Hershey's is alright but nothing special or worth getting excited about. Honestly nowadays I can't say I enjoy snack bars or most candy besides cookies, dark chocolate and sour candy. I hate Reese's with a passion, though that's likely because of my hatred of peanut butter.
Some "flavors" translate better for poptarts, but they're mostly eaten for the convenience and being "good enough" if you're like a lot of americans who don't have easy access to a pastry shop.
No. 32482
Milkyway Midnight. I'm sorry but great as Butterfinger may be it's just an inferior snack bar and only is so good partially because of the texture which is also irritating how much it gums up your teeth. Kitkat is a vastly inferior bar to just about everything but okay sometimes.

I really don't get why foreigners shit on our chocolate. What kind of crap is even being exported? Is this even the same stuff we eat? Because this isnt the first time I've heard this and have heard multiple times that Hersheys supposedly tastes like vomit. I don't get that and cannot understand the hate.

Regular Milkyway is pretty decent, and so is Snickers. Snickers Almond is great. Reeses is godly despite how horrifically artificial it tastes. I seriously cannot understand what they do to that because it clearly tastes almost nothing like real peanut butter. It doesnt even taste like that Jif crap. Three Muskateers is also pretty good.

Honestly we have lots of great treats although I think a lot of things are just what's "popular" ie most mass produced garbage made just for bydlo like all our mass entertainment, mass beer if you can even call it that etc and meanwhile we actually have some of the highest quality stuff it's just more hipsterish and local, although admittedly I do find things like Lindt marginally superior, which is just the slightly more expensive mass produced crap they have in Europe.

OH. And Cadburry eggs. Those are freaking amazing although I think that may actually be a European company.
No. 32487
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Am doing my citizenship test nou. It's been a while since I actually studied about something let alone an entire country.
No. 32521
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Yesterday I wrote a poem based on this picture.
Originally I wanted it to be prose but nonsense, but by halfway through I subconsciously made it rhyme and it turned into a short poem by the end.
Basically instead of writing something "deep", I wanted to write absolute nonsense without any meaning, painting a surreal image.
I'm currently re-editing the prose part to make it into a poem.
The way I translated "He seeks the parmesan" into Hungarian makes it have a nice rhythm.
First time I'm consciously editing an actual poem. Turns out all the time I spent with the Iliad and the Greeks is paying off, since I was able to identify the rhythm's Greek parts.
Sadly it's not a dactyl because the last word would need another two-mora long syllable.

I've been looking at surreal memes on reddit, and I like them a lot. It's great.
You can build up an entire nonsense-universe in your head where you don't have to explain anything, but it feels like it's operating by unwritten laws that are completely natural to its inhabitants, but makes no sense to us.
Take a look at the youtube animation "The Riddle of the Rocks". It's crazy, but the characters don't just live "in the random", but in a universe unlike ours.
Or look at Pilotredsun shorts. You have no idea what's going on, but it makes perfect sense by the time you re-watch it for the fifth time. You accept the new laws.

Then I'm going to write an essay on the "layers" of a novel. I was accidentally tasked with it when I bumped into the teacher while trying to get something printed.
Told me it'd be a "fitting task" for me.
So I guess I'm doing it.
Turns out I keep fucking up tests. Only got two fours this year, despite aiming for fives.
Though my all the materials I've handed in so far haven't been corrected, so that should help a bit, but it's still crushing.

Still haven't finished Hamlet, and I'm going to get dirty looks tomorrow for being slow and lazy.

The room is a bit cleaner now. I can't really put anything anywhere because I have too many books.
Everything feels just a bit hopeless.
But I guess I'll try to get as much as possible done.

Both Reese's and Hersey's taste like vomit in my opinion. Reese's more so.
If you grew up with it, I guess it's fine, but as an outsider, it just feels a tad bit disgusting and off-putting.
No. 32526
>I really don't get why foreigners shit on our chocolate. What kind of crap is even being exported? Is this even the same stuff we eat?

It's a cultural taste thing. My take is that chocolate here is much richer than American equivalents with Hersheys tasting like plastic as a result but that Europeans are ultimately just a bit autistic with food. Britain and Ireland get the same shit from the continent and after Brexit will probably ban our chocolate being labelled as such.

Things like Snickers are a different kind of chocolate ('candy bar' is perhaps more apt here) and they are popular. Only difference is we call your Milky Way a Mars Bar and instead Milky Way is like Three Musketeers - as a rule everything under the Mars corporation has an equivalent here. That said, Kinder Bueno > Alle.
No. 32527
Is there one Canadian citizenship test or does each state operate its own? I can imagine the Quebecois would make a point on this given Canada's messy federal system.
No. 32528
It's probably that we put more milk in our chocolate tbh. This may also be related to how some people claim it has a vomit like aftertaste. It's also so incredibly sweet I've noticed that when I take a sip of something like Arizona sweetened tea/juice drinks which are basically flavored sugar water that they taste like slightly tart water to me.

I suspect sweetness is also a difference. Not sure why but Americans sure do love their sweetness, although it tastes absolutely fucking awful in beer. Supposedly we sugar our breads but I haven't noticed it, but then again, I know for a fact we sweeten our crap "peanut butter" and it doesn't taste like sugar to me (I'm talking about the fake bullshit peanut butter product, not real peanut butter that's just peanut solids in oil). So I suspect that overall European candies may be less sweetened and the same goes for pastries with a bit more savory feeling while our breakfast cereal is probably more heavily sweetened than your chocolates.
No. 32529 Kontra
Okay, for some reason I can't seem to be able to write a coherent text, so fuck it, I'm going to postpone it.
Seriously, fuck everything.
No. 32530 Kontra
It's not the milk, it's the stabilising acids that are used to cut costs.
Swiss chocolate has plenty of milk in it, but it's actually the best chocolate you can get, contrary to a vomit flavoured Hersey's bar.
No. 32538
Something fucked up just happened.
My download speed tripled for no reason even though such speeds are far beyond the ISP plan I'm subscribed to, while my upload speed is near zero, and gets dropped after a few seconds.

Kazakh ISPs, not even once.
No. 32539
I’ve been reading about gardening lately. I think I will attempt to propagate some of the hardy succulents we have growing outside (Hylotelephium spectabile). If I get the offsets to callous over and extend roots I will pot them and put them in my south facing room by the window.
No. 32540
Regarding Chocolate, I had Zotter Bars lately, they are priced at 3.60€/70g, best chocolate I've ever ate so far. Produced in Austria, if you can gets your hands on it, just try and get blown out of the candy water. I think they have around 400 flavors but damn.
No. 32541

They can be ordered in the US as well, I only ever had their hand scooped, 7$ but just look the fillings, incredible taste.
No. 32551
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My life is so fucking bleak that the highlight of my week was going birdwatching at the park with my mom. I am 22 years old.
No. 32552
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I probably don't even have a highlight next week. Just the usual treadmill with a few nicer moments that belong to the weekly routine but still can be separated from the tiring filter that I see thru while engaging with the environment and for a few moments keep you away from thinking about tasks and problems that need to be solved.
No. 32554
Could be worse. You could have no highlights whatsoever. Although I'm not entirely sure if it's really bad, because living a calm and stable life without any disturbances seems fine to me.
No. 32555
>My life is so fucking bleak that the highlight of my week was going birdwatching at the park with my mom. I am 22 years old.
Eh, some mothers appreciate some company. Worry when that becomes the highlight of the month.
My usual highlights aren't on that level, though I am slightly older.
No. 32559
Matronly black woman at the convenience store called me “sweetheart”, probably because I was buying a pack of COMBOS® Pizzeria (pathetic).

Military coup in Bolivia.

I will wear socks to bed tonight.
No. 32560
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Yeah I do the coal runs in my piece of shit Megane, but I never noticed any lingering smells. Our coal stove is actually completely fucked but the landlord is a psycho who throws tantrums when we contact him and threatens us with eviction, so the house is falling apart now. At least I'll get him heavily fined by the relevant authorities before I leave here.

>we call your Milky Way a Mars Bar
Those are two separate bars on the Ireland
>Kinder Bueno > Alle.
Buenos are godly, I buy them in packs of 4 from tesco and that's why I'm fat

Some buddies of mine always joke that surviving 200 days in The Long Dark should be the Canadian citizen test

The stuff from the USA I've tasted that people have brought back from holidays tasted like concentrated sugar to me. Unfortunately a lot of the gluten and lactose free alternatives that I sometimes try out taste like pure sugar too.

I had a similar experience years ago on the London underground, THICC black ticket lady kept talking to me and calling me sweet
No. 32567
I don't suppose you are a filipino Canadian who was browsing KC and studying at a university in Victoria as of ~4 years ago?
No. 32574
We got it from powder slipping out of small holes in the sack and getting into the car carpet and shit. Didnt bthet me tbh since it smelt like a workshop most of the time anyeay.
No. 32575
Also, a family with young kids just sat down close to my kitchen, then the next song started
>its the bong of eternal steeeench!

I got dirty looks but I cant help but laugh :-DDDDD
No. 32577
Ebin :-DDD.
Reminds me of a bit of interaction I had at the mental ward. I was listening to some music on my Sansa Clip+ Personal Music Player sitting sitting on a bench, smiling and enjoying me time (the drugs had kicked in at the time), when one of the patients came up to me and asked what I'm smiling about.
I said I'm listening to one of my favorite songs
"Oh, what kinda song is it?"
"Well, it's called Legalize Drugs and Murder."
He freaked out a bit and left :-DDDDD.

I take it you like instrumental stoner doom the most? Me too, but sometimes I'm hankering for singing (or squealing) just for the ebin factor of hearing lyrics about Satan and bongs and sentient weed and shit :-DDDD.
No. 32579
Yeah. I like the monolithic noise factor of stoner doom. I feel like the vocals usually break it up too much for my liking, a notable exception is something like The Great Barrier Reefer by Bongripper. Even though the samples break it up some, they sort of create different moods within a single song that is 80 minutes long :-DDD. Also, I recommend Grotto if you haven't already listened to them. Smokonomicon and Circle of Magi are better albums than Lantern of Gius though. Less bass than the likes of Bongzilla and Belzebong, but the riffs are ebin.

Typically, if I want vocals, I have other genres for that which appeal in different ways. That said, finding the most ebin puns is a great way to explore stoner doom. It seems like the more 420 blaze it the menes are, the better it is. Subtlety is not a virtue in this genre.
No. 32594
Wrote a test today. Had to answer a bunch of questions and write two small essays, one about the European Alliances before WW1, and one about the societal consequences of the industrial revolution in Great Britain.
I studied hard for it, so I hope it turns out well.

I was notified that the notes I made on Shostakovich's music last year are now actually used for teaching.
Feels good that I managed to achieve even such a superficial change.

Stayed for media class. It was mildly interesting, though incredibly superficial. We took a look at Thriumph des Willens.
The teacher introduced the movie in a secretive manner, calling it The work of a controversial female director. Told the guys sitting next to me that you can fucking bet it's going to be Riefenstahl's film.
Sadly I haven't gained any new insight into the film's history and why it was revolutionary back then, besides what I already knew.

Got a dehumidifier. It has a giant stone in it for some reason.
Eagerly awaiting to see how effective it is.

The area between my jawbone and neck hurts for some reason. I hope it's nothing serious, but it had been getting progressively worse throughout the day.
No. 32595
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I'm facing a life dilemma: I've been selected to be interviewed for another area of work on a promotion and a healthy 33% pay rise (the interview will be ezpz and the extra responsibility isn't different to what I do now) only problem is that the pay rise comes as compensation for working in a much less interesting area. I genuinely like my job now and feel valued as part of my team, part of the reason I submitted this application is the feeling though that I need to be climbing the career ladder and that I'm underpaid. It feels like I'm making the choice of whether I want to grow up. What would Ernst do to arrive at a decision?

Also, the office Christmas committee today asked everyone to submit a picture of themselves as a child and your childhood crush. If I shoot up the place do you think it would be ruled as self-defence?

>Matronly black woman at the convenience store called me “sweetheart”, probably because I was buying a pack of COMBOS® Pizzeria (pathetic).

Do old Americans not use terms of endearment? Here you might be called love and muhduck (my duck) although, I always find it jarring given I'm a heartless southerner.
No. 32597
>submit a picture of themselves as a child and your childhood crush.
>shoot the place up

Why is that so much of a problem? Is that a traumatic episode of your life? I cannot really remember the name of my childhood crush(es) I've actually seen a bagina and kissed some of them back then, man, what just happened along the way, becoming quite a chan dweller weirdo?.
I mean do you have old photographs or do they implicate that you find out what she is doing today and ask for a photo?

Concerning the promotion I have no advice.
No. 32598
I'd say he's rightfully distressed.
Your childhood pictures are very personal. It's a family matter, and they shouldn't be asking for images of you as a kid.

I wouldn't feel comfortable with sharing them either.
(And who the hell keep a picture of their first crush? Maybe mentally, but not in the physical realm.)
No. 32599
Some weeks ago I sat in the library on a sunday, working on my paper and because I wanted to look out of the window I took seat between two women, one was kinda cute and well dressed. I've seen her quite often since then and today I found out she is french, Oh la la Ernst...I...ah who am I fooling here, she is just another (Á) une passante

A lightning flash... then night! Fleeting beauty
By whose glance I was suddenly reborn,
Will I see you no more before eternity?

Elsewhere, far, far from here! too late! never perhaps!
For I know not where you fled, you know not where I go,
O you whom I would have loved, O you who knew it!
No. 32600
The weirder part is that they're asking for a picture of someone who is a stranger to you.

That's, like, double second hand breach of privacy. They're asking him for his private information, and then also for him to get someone's private information and hand it to them. What the fuck.
No. 32601
Ach, you don't have humor, Ernst(s)! :^)

they see you everday, so whats to so alienating about a sharing a childhood version of yourself?

>And who the hell keep a picture of their first crush?

If I'd go thru the pictures of my birthday kid parties, I'd probably find one of my crushes, if my parents still have such pictures, and I'm pretty sure they do.
No. 32602
The gobernmint is onto somethings :DDDD

No seriously, you might be right it's private in the age of social media not so much anymore tho. But these are kids photos, nobody will notice anything with that, I mean did you reject being photographed at school because other families could possibly see your photo in the year book? Come on!
Also that's the source of school crush photos I just noticed.

I'm not quite sure but wasn't there a brock on KC who shared photo of his family and himself? Not sure if it is you, who did that.
No. 32603
133 kB, 635 × 637
>I mean did you reject being photographed at school
Actually, yes.
I couldn't weasel out of the yearbook photo, but before that, I managed to avoid being photographed during events, also asking for the camera after some school / trip photoshoot and deleting all of the ones with me. I must erase all evidence of my existence not controlled by myself.

Well, my attitude towards photos relaxed since then, but there are still not many photos of me due to not having any human contact. I don't really get this normie obsession of taking photographs and logging the events of their lives. It's a futile and desperate attempt to hold on to the fleeting moments of being, and assert their own existence into the decaying passage of history. It is as if they must constantly remind themselves and others that they do exist, and that the events of their lives were real, lest they vanish into oblivion right then and there.

I need no such reassurances. I already know I don't exist.
No. 32604
1,3 MB, 333 × 250, 0:02
>Why is that so much of a problem?

Crosses professional lines for me. I keep my work and private life distinct - not in an antisocial sense but I'm just not that guy who responds well to probing.

Childhood crush in this sense would be for someone famous (and embarrassing for fun). I don't think this question works for blokes, "oh no I had a star trek crush" "n-not Gwen Stefani no one must know my secret!" ¯\(ツ)
No. 32605
>Childhood crush in this sense would be for someone famous
Do people in the west really do this?
Have actors as their first crushes instead of a classmate?
No. 32606
Man does that gif accurately represent my internal social life. I can be pretty outgoing when needed but most of that time is just...meh

Like fuck why do I even need to pretend you're interrupting my thoughts and that is not okay with me
No. 32612
>Crosses professional lines for me. I keep my work and private life distinct - not in an antisocial sense but I'm just not that guy who responds well to probing.

I see. There is the fine art of telling people about you but not letting them have a clue. I guess that is what you to are doing, because keeping an all tightly closed mouth would make you boring and asocial coworker which you not seem to be according to your description.
But even tho I think that is ok and desired, a picture of you as child is not really a big deal, take it with a grain of salt and not as spying on your private life. I mean who cares anyway? It's a short fun. Unless you tell a super private story to it, that reveals a traumatic episode or something embarrassing like the star looked like your mom or something, that would be too much.
But a single photo (especially yearbook style) does not say much. Having a crush on some star is a bit weird, even tho I also fancied people I saw on TV screens.
No. 32613
No, you don't understand, the question is meant to be harmless fun rather than so personal. It was written by a woman so think boy-band obsession now regretted.

TV Picard in general is a good example of an introverted character and even a role-model. Not some robot but he enjoys his assburger interests while taking a focused approach to his passions.
No. 32617
There's something strangely personal about children's pictures. Like it's something distant, like it's some dead relative you don't like anyway. I value my private life but out of everything in my personal history, pictures of some brat with a shitty haircut aren't the worst thing ever.
The childhood crush angle sounds weird though. If it's really some random classmate, getting a picture would be difficult (I don't remember her face, much less her name by now).
No. 32620
I personally take it as a high offense spying on my private life, however I am actually aware of how unusual I take it as interpretations of privacy that others may not share but I wish respected nonetheless. I always felt it like a really personal private thing letting people like friends into my bedroom--which frankly it is. It's like rifling through a woman's purse. If she's a stranger just what the fuck business do you have being in there? Now maybe the country turning into a bizarre and horrifying combination of police state and corporate social media bullshit may be okay to some people with cops rifling through all your shit for whatever bullshit reason, asking your name, where you live, where you work, your ID, what you're doing, and corporations rifling through my data, sharing it, bothering me, etc but not one but of this shit is okay or frankly should be accepted by anybody. I probably have much stronger personal boundaries on average which means maybe other people are not okay with having their rights violated constantly but are still willing to get that part of themselves pushed around. I on the other hand am not.

Of course but then again I do actually avoid studying people's tattoos too much because I consider that snooping also. Which granted I am fully logically aware that they put that there specifically to be seen by everybody and advertise it, or that some people are just lonely and want attention and feel like the world doesn't care and want an uncaring world to acknowledge them and their feelings, but I quite frankly find that level of inspection to be crossing a boundary. I forget what other odd quirks I have of boundary crossing though, like paying too close attention to studying a person's thoughts and body language or, not that. Hmm I forget the other thing at the moment but do remember it being something I would objectively consider odd, like not staring too long at tattoos, which now that I think about it is probably not that unusual at all because city people are taught not to make eye contact with each other or especially not lingering eye contact. Maybe that's it. Is it that? Staring too long and too deeply into a stranger's eyes. Maybe it is that but I have other reasons for generally avoiding it these days.

None of this is to say those boundaries are iron I just think it's highly inappropriate for a stranger to do something like that or request a childhood photo, because it's unprofessional and not part of the bargain. It's the same way if like you find a picture of your boss shirtless with his wife enjoying a cocktail, there's nothing wrong with that but you know it, and he knows it, and coworkers all know it that a perceptual line has been crossed and that you're intruding on something private even if it is playful. Perhaps it is because a look behind the mask of whatever your work costume may be, idk. What I do know is, while it is totally okay to rifle through a friend's purse, or have a friend or lover in your bedroom or staring deeply in your eyes, or knowing numbers and addresses, or looking through a childhood photo album together, these are private things that no stranger has the right to intrude upon, particularly where workplace politics are concerned.
No. 32626
My manager is a massive fucking boyscout and its pissing me off.
No. 32632
So I caught a cold over the weekend but instead of curing out I did two nightshifts, now it got worse. At least today's free so I ingested some kratom and won't leave my bed anymore for anything else than getting myself food.
No. 32636
Art class is absolute bollocks. Half of it was spent again on some random piece of media not connected to the subject of the lesson.
This time we were shown a clip of the guy who only has one foot as an example of positivity.
Didn't he try to commit suicide multiple times?

My notes on Shostakovich were apparently helpful.
The first class that was taught based on it apparently liked his life story of how he fell from grace and had to balance between integrity and survival. They didn't really care about the music itself, but hey, their consent, enjoyment and interest is secondary in the public education system, ain't I right?
Fuck, I actually did something. Feels great.

Literature class was okay. Strangely enough we talked about haiku.
The teacher read aloud some of Basho's works in Japanese, and it was cringeworthy.
Got into a short discussion whether or not the 5-7-5 partition is actually a thing or not.
Just sent a letter containing proofs that it is.

When I got home I wanted to start catching up with the translation work my father gave me a few weeks ago, but no, I have to fucking go back to the city to meet my mother to buy me a suit.
I fucking hate this shit. We talk over how I don't want to go back so we'll do it tomorrow, but no, we have to fucking do it anyway.
Fuck prom too. And it's raining to top it all off.
I just want to grillwork for God's sake!
No. 32656
216 kB, 1024 × 1024
>The first class that was taught based on it apparently liked his life story of how he fell from grace and had to balance between integrity and survival.
Very impressive, ernst.

I went to the Nike Factory Store yesterday to look for new shoes, and actually found the style I wanted on the back 'discount wall'. That's where they put the last few pair of a given style or color to clear their inventory. All of the shoeboxes on that wall have the top torn off, so everyone in line to pay knows you're a cheapskate :DD. After buying one pair, I ended up going back to grab a second. I'll need them eventually and probably won't be able to beat that price.
No. 32721
98 kB, 800 × 510
63 kB, 600 × 453
103 kB, 482 × 475
65 kB, 566 × 480
I come home and this place is full of shitposting. It is probably comparable to coming home and your dog shitted all over the place. What a mess, time for some beatings!
No. 32733
It'll blow over.
Keep calm, and carry on.
No. 32747
7 kB, 189 × 200
I accidentally opened Pornhub in the uni library.

No. 32750
Some 16 yo was killed in my street this morning and the cops are trying find out what happened. Looks like the assassin killed him using a suppressor since no one heard the gunshots and as always, this is related to drug lords.

Just third world things...
No. 32751

Oh lord... How it happened?
No. 32778
Was the kid local?
No. 32787
32 kB, 292 × 271
Me attempting to interpret body language of an grills
No. 32824

He was a local wannabe criminal. I think he made someone angry and some hitman killed him.
No. 32931
>wannabe criminal
Then I’d say that both the state and society made a good bargain, since this way they only have to finance a single investigation (like thex give a damn) and the burial, instead of having to finance his future “endeavors” at the courthouse and in prison.
No. 32935
2,4 MB, 495 × 525, 0:04
Tonight I upgraded from an i5 3470 to a Ryzen 3700X
No. 32939
Had a shift with my line manager today. There's some serious power plays going down right now with the new VM behind the scenes. There is talk of a workplace strike going down, but also knowledge of the VM hiring backup managers and staff, which translates to 'a bunch of dirty scabs'.

It's pretty rare for our workplace to get so unified behind wanting someone gone, but this guy is something else. Fake nice all the time, doesn't lead but barks orders, and the tills have had some weird mismatches plus tip jar has gone missing, so we dunno if it's bad maths on his part or if he's skimming. Interesting times though tbh. I just wish that they were interesting in a non-terrible way.
No. 32944
That's not really an upgrade, more like a complete replacement.

Also I think such upgrades aren't really necessery. My newest computer is a 6 years old i3 4000M, but I still use computers with C2D, and they work fine. I don't feel any need to replace them.
(On the other hand thanks to those hedonists who keep upgrading despite they don't really need to, I can get perfectly fine computers and parts for shit and piss.)
No. 32987
Rainy day and rest of the week here. It's cozy unless you have to go outside grocery shopping. I think I need to go daily jogging, after moving back to my small hometown I've had difficulty getting even the moderate daily steps of 7,5k on my phone. In Helsinki you could get 10k steps just walking in one of the malls for an afternoon, running to get the tram/bus/metro/train while commuting back home afterwards.

I hate going outside without purpose and there's barely anything to do in this bönde town. Getting a dog would force me to take walks in all weather, but it is not an option...
No. 33005
34 kB, 906 × 479
It'sliterally several times more powerful as well as being more energy efficient.
No. 33018
141 kB, 1200 × 1470
Writing applications. It fucking sucks.
No. 33161
Still at it?

It's retarded for someone suffering from social anxiety to work in customer service, yet I had to take the job like an idiot. I stammered and my hands were shaking when I finally met the client after waiting for him for the whole day. Now Now I will take benzos and go to bed. Good night Ernst.
No. 33166
Worked on translating the article. It's going well, only one and half pages left. Should be done my tomorrow.
My sister asked me to help with her English homework.
Sometimes I completely forget that English has grammar. I mean, if I were to take a test right now about English grammar I'd no doubt fail.
You know, I can put it into practice, but I have no fucking clue what some of the concepts are called, and thinking about it, it feels weird.
Thank the Heavens that we are asked to put it to practice at the exams and not to cough up what Present Perfect is.

Turns out I'll actually have to learn Hamlet's grand monologue by heart. They expect it at this level.
Not in English, for better or for worse.
Heard this really interesting story from a teacher how they'd kick you from the philosophy department back in the glory days in university if you couldn't quote this part without hesitation.

I'm feeling pretty content right now. Things are on track, finally.
No. 33172
Several times more powerful and also several times more expensive. Question is: do you actually need that extra power?
No. 33175
he bought a cpu that he is going to assemble himself, apparently, not really an iphone xr. the odds that he will use that cpu to its full potential are decent.
No. 33183
It's Kazakhstan. Of course he's going to use it. But on the one hand, he does in fact hate all the exact sort of triple A garbage that would probably make the most use of it, but on the other hand, he also for some obscure reason keeps getting sidelined into doing bullshit computer work for abject retards all the time so my money's on him actually making the most of it. And besides I freaking wish I could do that. To this day I am the most limited by my shitty old CPU. I mean it does the job but it's an i5 3300 series and it's quite simply incapable of dealing with the higher end games regardless of anything else I do about it because so many of them also rely on processing power primarily, like even for example Cities Skylines, as well as Gothic Armada II which looks like unplayable dogshit on any setting just to launch the game because apparently BF GA 2 is pegged more to the CPU. Which is a damn shame because it's the Battlefleet I actually really wanted to get and remains the one top wishlist game I wanted that now can afford and otherwise theoretically run but the CPU falls short. So there is things like Battlefleet Gothic series which I am not entirely sure is it like AA tier? Because I think Battlefleet Gothic Armada 2 is supposed to be like triple A tier or at least AA right?

And then there are all the other professional reasons for having an actually decent functioning CPU
No. 33193
Well, a 16 core might be overkill, yes. Unless he does video editing or 3D rendering or something.
But most games nowadays are optimized to run on 8 threads (since that's what consoles have), so upgrading from a 4 core 4 thread CPU seems like a decent choice. If he doesn't play games, then it doesn't matter which CPU he has at all :-DDDD.

I'd say Ryzen 2600 is about the sweet spot for general desktop use, so you can check out some newer games if there's one in particular that interests you, and you can do a bit of CAD work too.

I'm not the one upgrading the CPU, look at the flag of the original poster :-DDD. I was just clarifying some information.
I'm still on an ancient i7, and I'm not upgrading yet because I'd have to switch to a new chipset AND to DDR4 RAM, basically throwing away my entire system for a 40% CPU performance upgrade. Doesn't seem worth it yet.

Also, regarding dealing with abject retards, you have to understand that I'm not unlucky, people are just like that here. (Ok, maybe unlucky for being born on the kazakhstan). You have to understand that people outside the Western world do not have the same philosophy and ethics that made the West rule the world in the first place. Sure, we have the same technology and pop culture and stuff due to globalization, but there is no understanding of the NATURE of those technologies or sciences. Everything is done by appearance here. People attempt to copy the appearance of the West without understanding the underlying logic and methodologies behind it all. Kargo cult is the term I think. Due to being essentially raised in the western cultural sphere thanks to early exposure to the internet and fluency in english, I can clearly see the difference. So when I try to explain that what they're doing is totally wrong and if they only did a bit of research they'd be able to create a system that works, rather than copying its superficial qualities, they look at me like some schizo retard talking gibberish.
(Healthy oriental child goes to the western cultural sphere, gets pumped with massive shots of western ethos, doesn't feel good - AUTISM. Many such cases).
So they will hack together some barely working system, knowledge of which they gathered from trivia, hearsay and superstition, and will NEVER let anyone (non-western) ever touch it, because they are afraid that it will break. They do not know how it works, so they are afraid of messing with it.
When it DOES break, they will hire a white man to fix it for many, many dollars.

I've had a lot of experiences like that. For example, I briefly had an internship at an automated diaper production factory built by the Japanese. The whole thing was a huge box of sensors and gizmos controlled by a central computer. Meaning, the thing ran on software, unlike analog (or however you call them) systems left over from soviet times. Well, after the thing was built, they somehow pissed off the Japanese engineers (probably tried to scam them out of pay), so they left and took their software with them, leaving the whole production line as a pile of inanimate metal and plastic. Then they had to hire a wecterners(tm) (a pair of italian PLC programmers) for obscene amounts of money to write the controller software. I asked them if I could work with the Italians to learn and document the software so I could become an in-house programmer for them. The reply I got was "You will not touch that computer, you will not come near that computer, you will not even look at that computer". I'm not sure if they thought I'd steal their "secret", or that it's impossible for a non-westerner to communicate with the holy machine spirits inside the magic box, but clearly they thought that there was some kind of incomprehensible space technology going on there, and only a highly trained western demi-god could ever understand its divine properties.

The Italian programmer, by the way, was a clueless 50 something year old boomer who clearly wasn't any kind of genius, because later I snuck out a copy of the code and the proprietary programming software, and the whole thing was written in some kind of graphical programming language, with variable names in Italian, in an imperative style without any functions. No wonder it took them half a year to get it working. They didn't even speak English well.

Such is life on the third world. It's only recently that I learned to set aside my autism and feelings about ordnung, and just roll with it. Do the bare minimum, show an appearance of work, take my money and fuck off, just like everyone else here does. Russians have a good saying about this: "If you live with wolves, howl like a wolf".
No. 33198
Oh wait nvm that was Australia not you.
No. 33286
26 kB, 1200 × 600
Foreigners wondering about the disappointing economic results with Bolsonaro (which are not terrible - the country is still growing -, but it's below what was expected) need to understand that, although he is the president, he IS NOT the leader of the country and has actually very little power.

This happens because Bolsonaro has run on an anti-corruption platform, and his Justice Minister is judge Sergio Moro, simply the most hated man among the Brazilian political elite, for the mere fact that he arrested a lot of its members. Thus Bolsonaro himself is seen by other politicians as an outsider, an intruder, a complete party-spoiler.

Besides being hated by the presidents of both houses, Bolsonaro also has to deal with the fact that ALL ELEVEN of our Supreme Court Justices are left-wingers to some extent. There is not a single - I repeat, not a single - conservative, or even classical liberal amongst them.

Add all that and you have as consequence the fact that Bolsonaro's government is being sabotaged from absolutely all directions, and he has much less power than Donald Trump (he was never an influential billionaire with influential friends) has in the US. Besides, he isn't nearly as smart and often reacts to pressure in very terrible and idiotic ways.
No. 33289
395 kB, 278 × 400, 0:13
I try, but I can't dislike this man. It's not possible.
No. 33308
19 kB, 598 × 149
finding interesting historical perspectives on twitter
No. 33318
108 kB, 283 × 244
>Get home
>Want to finish translation fast
>Widows won't start up for some reason
>"It's fucked.exe"
>Realise I made no backup of the files
>Can't access the drive with a livedisc
>Chkdsk says nothing is wrong with drive C:
I'm on the verge of saying fuck it and drink some and go to bed.
If it's not backed up, then it's not important
And I fucking thought it was the bloody external drive that got cocked up.
If I'm going to have to re-do that in 1-2 days, I'm going to kill someone, probably myself.
Everything was coming along so nicely, and now it's fucked beyond repair.
No. 33324
Bolsonaro is also a cunt and a retard who is fantastically corrupt himself. His own diplomatic team was caught smuggling cocaine
I have no idea why anyone would defend this utterly corrupt fascist dickhead.
No. 33326
Bolsonas llenas de coca!
No. 33342
23 kB, 489 × 348
Nevermind I "fixed" it.
So, the replacement PC I used to replace the other computer broke.
So now I'm using my replacement replacement computer, the Toshiba trashtop. Quite ironic how it's almost a decade old, but this one never had to be repaired.

I just realised that besides a few short pieces I wrote, I saved nothing onto the main drive. It was just trash (ironic memes and pictures of cheap wine) with the 2-3 necessary files.

I was expecting my sister or my mother to come home, so that I wouldn't have to make lunch for myself. Now it's almost 6 o' clock, and apparently they came home, and then immediately left.
So I'm making food now. Might have a beer. Or not. Probably not.

Can't fucking believe it took me 2-3 hours to find a way to save the files.
At least I managed to keep my composure and not shout or break anything.
No. 33345
I had to take my elderly father to the ER again, he was in such severe pain he finally agreed to see a doctor. Sciatica pain is a bitch, the only treatment is pain killers and hope it will stop eventually.
No. 33346
Oh fuck, my wife had that so bad it was unbearable. She ended up being confined to a wheelchair until spinal surgery could be done to unfuck her nerves. It comes back from time to time and I usually panic because I don't want it to come back chronically but thank god it never does.
No. 33347
Have a food made from beer.
No. 33349
I think a lot of it really comes down to the manufacturer. OH. And computers. That is the one other thing that I think you should never completely cheap out on along with vidya, cologne, shoes, used cars, and to an extent movies music and books (although usually there's really good hard copy books for cheap). I had to have spent probably a good $1500-2000 over the years on shitty real piece of shit cheap laptops from HP. I know utterly refuse to ever buy anything from that terrible godawful fucking company again. I actually seriously once bought an HP laptop that died within the first 24 hours of me owning it. I could not ever get it to boot back up. It simply shit itself right out of the box. At least I was able to return that but stupidly replaced it. All of my laptops from them died in like two years or less. Meanwhile I actually got a Dell desktop and that rusty bucket of bolts had lasted me since 2012. Keep in kind this was basically a thing that's seen constant daily use. Each day I dread some part of it dying and failing but even at 7 years it's a nice machine still and has only recently been hitting the wall of being unable to handle new games which I solved mostly by installing a cheap GPU. I now need RAM but I'm too tight on cash to deal with it, and am dimly aware that I may not be able to update the CPU in there without having to basically overhaul the whole damn mainboard and get new system components. I'm still using DDR3 RAM for example.
No. 33351
>she ended up being confined to a wheelchair until spinal surgery could be done to unfuck her nerves
Yes, surgery is one solution but for a 70+yo obese old man with heart condition it's not possible. Hell, putting him under anesthetic would be too risky. I hate seeing him in pain, without being able to help.
No. 33383
This is part of why some women want breast reduction surgery. I know you're saying it's for other reasons but if that is the case then overly large breasts do not help. One person I was involved with was telling me how much of a pain in the ass it is and how much it gave her back pain. If you have large enough breasts it can eventually start giving you serious back issues.
No. 33424 Kontra
I remember reading a google search consumes quite some energy. I wonder how that is with postings. It literally must be gigantic waste of energy.
No. 33440 Kontra
I drank coffee.
Now I feel like shit.
I shouldn't have.
End of blogpost.
No. 33445
Yeah, at least the drugs available now are worlds ahead of what was available 20 years ago, super strong painkillers and anti-inflammatories etc.
Well yeah, her boobs were the cause of the problem since she has macromastia and her lower back was always in poor shape then in 2014 one of her spine's discs ruptured from it. Thing is though I see girls with much smaller boobs complaining about back pain and get them chopped off whereas some girls with massive knockers can carry them like a pro.
No. 33455
It's really interesting how foreigners interpret our news...

It was just cocaine being smuggled in an airplane of the Brazilian air force.

The smuggler was taking 39kg (you can put it in a big bag) and was a sargent who worked for the Brazilian air force. He would have smuggled no matter whom was President, and probably did smuggling much before Bolsonaro came into scene too.


>O militar é segundo-sargento da Aeronáutica. Ingressou na Força Aérea Brasileira em 2000. Ganha pouco mais de R$ 7 mil por mês. Desde 2011, ele fez 29 viagens no Brasil e no exterior.
>Muitas dessas viagens foram com a equipe presidencial dos presidentes Michel Temer (MDB), Dilma Rousseff (PT) e Bolsonaro. A partir de 2016, ele passou a integrar o quadro de tripulantes da aeronave VC2, que leva as equipes de apoio nas viagens oficiais da Presidência.

"The military man is second-sargent of the Air Force. He entered the BR Air Force in 2000. Ha makes a little more than 7 thousand reais monthly.
Since 2011, he's made 29 travels in Brazil and abroad. Many of these travels were with the presidential team of the presidents Michel Temer, Dilma Rousseff and Bolsonaro. Since 2016, he became a member of the crew of the airplane VC2, which takes support teams in the official voyages of the Presidency."

Bolsonaro himself had nothing to do with it, and probably would have fired the man immediately if he knew what he was doing.

Don't get me wrong, he is involved in shady stuff (his son did some corruption, although very small for Brazilian levels - but the family also had friendships with members of Rio de Janeiro militias). However, smuggling cocaine is definitely not one of them. It was news in Brazil for three or so days then everyone ignore it because it wasn't relevant - like most negative news pertaining to Bolsonaro.

By the way, did you know that October was the best month for the Amazon Rainforest ever since data begun to be collected? No, you didn't.
No. 33456
>By the way, did you know that October was the best month for the Amazon Rainforest ever since data begun to be collected? No, you didn't.
>best month

best by what metric?
No. 33457
43 kB, 467 × 467
Does the missus need a wheelbarrow?
No. 33481
Number of fires.
No. 33486
>some girls with massive knockers can carry them like a pro.

Well defined and layered muscle strains in the lower back as also good posture and training.
Even light and thus really hard to spot lumbar lordosis fucks with your health pretty heavy if you are "carrying" a lot.
No. 33506
I remember my anthro class talking about how much of a mess it was evolutionarily to evolve an upright posture particularly because of dealing with the birth canal. It had to bend itself multiple times in weird ways and to this day a lot of people get spinal and back problems. Kind of funny the things that seem rather imperfect. Dental hygiene is the other. It's not just us though. I know in definitely rodents and many other mammals one small thing going wrong with a tooth can be fatal. I personally had an infected tooth before and basically had that happened at any point in human history other than that tiny window that wasnt the last hundred years I'd be dead in my early 20s.

Human breeding patterns are also kind of weird. Modern humans and even earlier ones breed like an apex predator only having a few heavily invested offspring at a time whereas in the past we had almost more birdlike or fish like strategies of trying to constantly produce tons of offspring in the hope you could get at least a couple of them to survive to adulthood.
No. 33507
Once met a girl who complained about how her tits were heavy. Another with similarly sized breasts seemed fine. Then again the latter was also really fat, so maybe she was "balanced"? I'm not a health pro.
No. 33517
>It's retarded for someone suffering from social anxiety to work in customer service, yet I had to take the job like an idiot
God damn it, I'm shaking from anxiety. This was one particularly bad day.
No. 33519
Oh, woe is me today I suffered so much.
No. 33523
1,6 MB, 2448 × 2448
1,6 MB, 2448 × 2448
My laptop ran out of battery while it was updating the kernel, and so the kernel became screwed up. I tried to revert the kernel version. It was partially successful, but my laptop still did not boot correctly. Then I thought that a more certain and faster method of getting it into a working state is just formatting the drive and reinstalling linux.
Real arch hours.
No. 33530
Finally got around to making a makeshift VESA mount for one of my old monitors with a drill and an angle bracket. Mounted it vertically. Code is now comfier to read and I feel like a l33t haxxor.

Check out a course called Overcoming Social Anxiety: Step By Step. It should be easy to find on a torrent site. It's essentially a series of weekly CBT sessions and exercises to retrain your anxious heda.
No. 33535
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It just werks
No. 33541
Finished reading Hamlet today. Best drama I've ever read.
Otherwise not much happened. Lit classes went well.
Got another Shakespeare drama assigned.
I could've picked any, but I went with Macbeth because I read Leskov's Lady MacBeth of the Mtsensk disctict and I felt that I was missing the reference.
Checking, bloody thing's only half the length of Hamlet. That's good news. I can finish a 90 pages long drama in a day.

Didn't work on the translation because I felt really tired when I came home.
So tomorrow I'm gonna finish that, then I'm going to try writing structured notes on Renaissance literature.
Thankfully the file didn't get corrupted and I can open it without much trouble. It was just hard to gain access it through a linux live desktop because Windows shat itself and closed the partition.

Tomorrow's gonna be fun. I also want to clean the room some more.
Currently drinking a Czech beer. I bought a few days ago.
No. 33563
Fug. Time for work. Feels bad having to go in during the middle of the day because it's stinking hot, and closing the kitchen fucking sucks.

Will update with workplace complainings when I return.
No. 33566
59 kB, 658 × 901
I started a initiative in my office for training where we'd do bulk booking for courses necessary for situational corporate needs - I'd just send out an interest poll and then once we've settled on a date I can handle all the booking myself. The traditional method has always been that people would book places individually with our contracted training provider which has had a low response rate and people have to work with the dates (usually just one) they are given.

The big thing is really that by booking together we can hold training on-site which cuts out the middle man. We were shown a better rate, the training company doesn't have to pay for a venue and the courses can even be adapted to our situational needs which means everyone wins. Unfortunately just as everything is sorted* and going well the training company turns around and now wants to charge us more per head than booking it individually at said external venues. Further research shows me that the training has been subcontracted to another organisation that owns the venue - obviously they give zero fucks about if I can host and they don't have motivation to offer different dates.

To add insult to injury I've been told that if I can double my numbers they will happily offer a discount on my terms. Of course they would. Never try any innovation no matter how small, the world will crush you for it.

*it took so long to even get to this stage. I've had a massive loss of reputation for this.
No. 33568 Kontra
I feel like fucking shit, migraines for two days in a row, the hell is going on.
No. 33578
What the fuck is it with alcoholic retards and their passion for "cooking" while drunk?
I keep waking up and going to cook something only to find the fridge emptied, and its contents dumped indiscriminately into a pot or pan, resulting in a kind of barely edible, sometimes burnt, stew. And the retard sleeping soundly on the couch.

He doesn't eat his own pig slop, he just "cooks" out of passion and destroys produce for no reason. I want to fucking murder him in his sleep. We already hide all of the money in the house, do we now have to hide the fucking groceries, too?
Why can't I just drag him outside and beat him to death? In a just society, that wouldn't be a crime. He is not even human.
No. 33579
99 kB, 497 × 137
>fridge emptied, and its contents dumped indiscriminately into a pot or pan, resulting in a kind of barely edible, sometimes burnt, stew
I don't need to be drunk to cook like that. I've nearly burnt down my home 3 times already.
>Why can't I just drag him outside and beat him to death? In a just society, that wouldn't be a crime. He is not even human.
Remind yourself that you are his spawn. Is there no Kazakh version of AA or some type of rehabilitation program that you can take him to? Maybe I'm just too clouded by my wectern bias to know how people in 2rd world countries should deal with such problems.
No. 33581
Well, you can do whatever you want with your own food, but when you ruin other peoples' food, that's when you should have the shit kicked out of you.

>AA or some type of rehabilitation program

He doesn't want to be rehabilitated. He wants to keep drinking. Besides, we're already barely scraping by, spending money on that idiot's rehabilitation is a waste, considering he's about as useless sober as he is drunk.
No. 33582
Don't worry, nobody who's participating cares enough to think about reputation. Soft skills training is just a legal day off.
No. 33585
I will thanks. This is my third year in government sponsored therapy but I'm still struggling with the anxiety and fear of people.
No. 33589
Work was fucking garbage. At least we got out pretty quickly at close, despite the fuckwit VM's policy of timing our closing time down to the second instead of just calling it as good enough a minute or two beforehand like everyone else does if there are no customers in sight. Tbh, it's probably my most loathed trait in this guy, how much of a goddamn boy scout he is. Never bends a rule, never thinks about reasonable alternatives to achieve goals in easier ways for everybody. It's got to be written down in the book or it's completely illegitimate. Motherfucker doesn't understand the concept of working smart, and he is in the same garbage pay bracket as the rest of us. Fucken workplace traitor man, and it feels worse since we've had VMs in the past who were workplace heroes who fucked with the boss on our behalf.

Pull on your bovvers mate, I sabotage meals (enough to be unpleasant but not enough to warrant splashback) for customers who are cunts to our front of house staff. One of my favourites is opening the pass sliders so that the breeze blows over the (slightly overdone) food. Front of house usually take their time to come collect it too. By the time it gets to the wanker in question, it's warm enough that they can't complain but not at a nice hot temperature that makes it genuinely enjoyable.
No. 33594
He keeps acting this way because he thinks he can keep getting away with it and so sees no reason to change himself. You need to kick him out of the house and not take pity on him.
No. 33595
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You know I keep reading this over again and laughing but I can't help but wonder what enabled us to get here to begin with? It's not like there is anything native to Europeans and Westerners not being completely abject retards themselves. I don't just mean in the past although having watched many such documentaries on plague it is amazing how superstitious and idiotic we were only a few centuries ago, with the basis of our medicine being to "align the humors of the body" because they heard that's what the ancient Greeks did and managed to cargo cult someone from 1500 years ago who also happened to be totally wrong, and whose treatments involved the stupidest shit like looking to positions of stars, trying to cleanse the poisoned air with perfume, and bloodletting which of course is a marvelous thing to do with a person infected with plague in a crowded city center that doesn't have any sanitation system. The only thing more amazing is all the stupid things they did while also managing to figure out a few things that at least superficially look like putting on the appearances of doing the correct thing which is quarantining, holding letters over candles and incense to "cleanse" them of the contagion, and soaking money in vinegar (which I'm assuming had some antiseptic properties owing to it likely having alcohol in it as well then). Apparently the plague doctor's masks had red lenses because they thought it might be transmitted by sight so "you will not touch sick people, you will not go anywhere near sick people, you will not even look directly at sick people" goes the logic.

But no, it's not even that. I don't think I know how to tell you how truly magnificently retarded Americans really are. Because you have mass media I think you get the idea but I've come to understand it's like dealing with 14th century peasants handling 21st century technology here. They do not understand the underlying methodologies or logic behind anything and frankly they don't even want to. Climate change denial, antivaxxers, the flat earthers who to this day I swear is all just one big troll and no one sincerely believes it, to all kind of new age quackery like "structured water" or "raw water" or people claiming different crystals and tones will grown extra strands of DNA like Fifth Element to any other nonsense coming out of those people.

My question is why is this? What makes a society and culture that way? How did the West as a whole even manage to break out of it and institutionalize not being a complete retard? Is it having something to do with longstanding institutions of a professional caste and specialization? Because somehow at least here in America we wre generally able to mimic being a true 1st world Western society in a lot of senses maybe not with government and public policy but still yet the society is broadly filled with the exact kind of retard you must suffer with every day.

Is it because of having stronger and older continuous institutions? Is that it? Or is it that combined with a certain culture? Like at work being a retard even in the lowliest bydlo jobs is not tolerated. You are expected to eventually understand not just the correct way to do something but the logic underlying it. Even things you might not think would matter so much but everything does, like washing dishes the right way, counting money the right way, pumping gas or checking for contaminants the right way, making sure food is cooked the right way, making sure furniture is moved and arranged the right way, like if you can think of just about any bydlo job here there is a right way and a wrong way to do it and regardless of profession you're expected to do it that right way efficiently and fast, from any professional to any bydlo at minimum wage. You say it is a cultural thing but is it that? How much is an institutional thing? Because we definitely still have a culture here of not knowing how to do something or not knowing about something and being proud of that, or treating people with suspicion who do actually know Thing except when person who does Thing is being paid to fix their problems for them then they're some kind of Catholic saint miracle worker with stigmata rubbing the miraculous blood of Christ onto their magic box that mysteriously works again. Or perhaps worse, they are so dumb they won't recognize knowing the exact wrong thing to do but will proudly and loudly proclaim their knowledge in an area and anyone who disagrees with bloodletting being an effective or safe treatment for HIV will loudly accuse you of some conspiracy or scam for contradicting the (false) knowledge of which they themselves feel quite certain.
No. 33608
I'm almost done with translating the article. The last ~2 pages are almost completely lifted from the older version, so I can just re-work my translation of that.
It's really cumbersome to edit from 3-4 files on a small screen.

The sun is setting sooner and sooner, and I think it helps a lot with my schedule. It's only 6 o' clock, and everything is dark and cosy, ideal for work.
No. 33664
Had quite bad panic and thought loops all the day. Now I'm so exhausted I feel soothed and safe nonetheless. Working nightshifts definitely has its ups, I barely ever feel so nicely empty and clear minded like after one of them.
No. 33680
I fucking despise that I have to use facebook for communication. Why can't people just send an e-mail instead of using that overly bloated mess that spies on you?
Whenever I have to open it, I feel unclean afterwards. It's humiliating.

Just had lunch.
Now looking through the translation before handing it in

I looked through the notebook I use as a diary again. I've written nearly a hundred pages' worth of diary entries.
Writing a diary feels as if it were a preparation for death in a sense.
You're writing a commentary on your own life as an art-piece.
For the first time in my life, I've written a notebook chock full of myself.

I also finally got rid of my beard and moustache. It feels really weird to have a smooth face again.

Wish I had an espresso.
No. 33719
If i go to the shop now that's at least 15 full beers.
I'm too much of an aggro cunt to stay in this cuntry, will end up in some third world chink cell or disappeared my images are online and I am outted as some spy I still hate this shitty political mess, time to walk away or at least drink more.
Pink Floyd never bores and it is never to late to turn to God.
No. 33724
Seems it's true that your brain solidifies as you get older.
I remember it took me only a couple months to figure out 3DS max as a 16 year old. And it was non-stop learning and fucking around with it the whole time, I almost never read any documentation, just clicked random shit and saw what it does, or googled.

Now when trying to learn Blender, I can only work in short bursts, and get really angry after a while for some reason. Especially when I google "how to do X" and some tard on stack exchange answers with "don't do X, do Y instead" or "you can't do X".

Maybe I should stop trying to be a jack of all trades and master of none and stick to drawing. Mostly because it feels really daunting to have to learn software / environments / standards / interfaces your whole life. Give me something that can put pixels on a raster canvas, and I can use it no problem. But with 3D, design, etc., proprietary shitware vendors keep shoving their locked down formats on everyone, so it's an endless fuckfest of "can you send me the file in .pdf / .ai / .fbx / .dwg ". Yeah, fuck you, it shouldn't be any of your business which software I use to do my work, just how a craftsman doesn't have to use a specific brand of hammer to get work done.

Or maybe all of this is just cope to fend off the creeping realization that I'm too retarded to learn anything even mildly complicated. I must've lost a bunch of IQ points while being medicated.
No. 33725
>perpetually drunk foreign agent in Hong Kong
On one hand I'm really surprised you haven't been hassled by the PRC already. On the other hand this sounds like a pretty amazing setup for a Disco Elysium type game. I'd love to wander through the streets drunk, missing one of my shoes, wading through a crowd of violent protests between the Chinese government trying to assert itself and Hong Kong protesters with likely wectern backing or sympathy, just trying to do an errand. Man that would be a fun and hilarious gaming moment.
Especially if I failed a check somewhere between my flat and the beer store, and I probably would fail one before getting there.
No. 33735
I can't take this any more.
It's fucking awful.
Nothing eases this feeling, no music no drink no food.
I have no idea what this is, but it's back again and I want to cry. That, or smash something.

Tried writing a poem.
Though I got an idea about a series of epistolary short stories that take place in a some regime with an extensive bureaucracy, with a literary alter-ego inserted into it.

Maybe the best option is to just turn off the computer and sleep.
No. 33737
Sounds like something is deeply unsatisfied. Perhaps quite known. I'm not where I want to be on different levels and areas in life, so yeah, I know that feel.

Your literary attempt hints at Kafka.

Have headache since a few hours, I read for my paper and took some notes. I planned about 5h of time investment into reading and noting for the paper today, it has been about two hours, maybe less. Going to take a shower now and read another chapter afterwards, then watch a movie and sleep.
No. 33757
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Don't want to make a new thread for this but I'm curious as to who you think was in the wrong here
No. 33760
He's right, the bugs aren't a problem. The problem seems to be his wife using a brief infestation as a focal point for her anxiety and marital unhappiness. He mentioned some things that had nothing to do with cockroaches, so I think on some level he realizes this. As far as being 'too laid back', he's definitly making a mistake there. He needs to figure out what's really wrong, because she's definitely not going to tell him.
No. 33769
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I talked to a girl I'm dating about my chance at a promotion and it's promise to raise in my income by a third. I thought it was strange that she saw my increase as something that I wouldn't even notice in my paycheque. Then we worked out that she is on nearly 3 times as much as me even though she's taken a job that has reduced money for fun.

Feels poor man. Not that I would change my work-life balance or do something less fun and more stressful based around selling shit but it hurts at times when I get reminders of things like no matter how much I squirrel away I will never be able to about afford my own property.

Good thing I'm a gold-digger.

>I don't just mean in the past although having watched many such documentaries on plague it is amazing how superstitious and idiotic we were only a few centuries ago

People worked on the information they had at the time. I like miasma theory in this sense because it makes complete sense given the information they had at the time drawn from physical sense. There's a different mindset at work as well, for example, people in the Middle Ages didn't believe in God they knew God existed and governance by personal relationships was not only the done thing but flourished as the practicable thing in places like the Spanish viceroyalties of Italy.

At any rate you're asking a question that would take a lifetime to answer in even an individual society. States outside the west tend to exhibit a post-colonial deference, various shade of conspiracy theorist across the world tend to be made up of followers and charismatic charlatans or mentally ill people.

How are you doing for interpersonal intimacy?

I agree with this but would add that I'd probably go bananas if I had a cockroach infestation in my flat. There does seem to be more bubbling up as a consequence of this stress, some of it perfectly normal at her age, none of that can be addressed unless he pulls his finger out and solves the roach problem first.

Also he's automatically wrong for using reddit etc.
No. 33772 Kontra
he sounds like a cuck and that's there's a lot more problems than the bugs.
No. 33778
I decided to pull an all-nighter today so my sleeping rhythm would stabilize again after my last nightshift (just came back).
Thing is only I already feel tired now even though there are still at least 16 hours to go for me, the last three of them being some local event I have to write an article about.
Other than that there isn't much to do, at least not much that I could do while lacking sleep. Reading would be too tiring for my eyes.
I read Wagner's Liebesverbot at work (which is ebin btw) and listened through a third of the opera on youtube, guess I'll continue listening it just to keep me awake.
Also I need to look for another internship so I can take on my new studies next year (I have 4 of 6 required weeks in the wanted field).
No. 33779
267 kB, 700 × 700
>How are you doing for interpersonal intimacy?
I wish someone would give me a hug and tell me everything is going to be all right
No. 33787
>please refrain from shitpostings

I feel like something is wrong with me. Now it feels my right side is cramped. Constantly dehydrated. odd smell in the nose almost like faint hints of aspirin.
No. 33792
Sometimes I get really lonely and sad, but then I retreat into my "schizo autistic retard savant" LARP and pretend that human interaction is not important compared to intellectual development. It helps a bit.
But god damn it those qt girls at the grocery store don't make it any easier. I have to force myself to not look at them.
I don't consider myself a lecherous or horny individual, but there's something irresistible about the endorphin rush of looking at a cute girl. Sometimes I even wish I could freeze time and draw a portrait. I wonder if that'd make a good opener. "Babe, you're so pretty, I want to take you back to my studio and paint your portrait. By the way, I'm a cubist".

But I don't even have a studio. According to my calculations, it will be at least 5 years before I rise up from my humiliating, shameful cockroach life. Then again, I said the same 5 years ago, but not being (as) mentally ill should help this time.
No. 33800
>By the way, I'm a cubist

>RE: birds
My tastes in women are a pretty massive blessing with regards to controlling the lizard-brain horniness tbh. They're either the sort who consider me a hooligan who they don't want to touch with a ten foot pole, or for my real kryptonite they just don't exist locally anymore. Feels good man.
No. 33801 Kontra
Als ob, it would appear that we've regained our independence :-D
No. 33803
Well, he mentions that his wife is upset that he does not initiate sexual contact with her more often and that he does not contribute to cleaning. So I would not really characterize that as cuckoldry, although it might be dysfunctional. To my thinking, cuckoldry would mean that his wife makes him do chores and ignores his sexual needs, not the other way around.
No. 33804
I am almost a sexual omnivore (especially during manic episodes), so my suffering great :-DDD

Don't upper class girls usually have a thing for lower class hooligan guys? Uptown girl, looking for a downtown man, you know :-DDDD
No. 33806
Only when they're young and trying to piss off their fathers

I read this as you trying to achieve Communism in your personal life with women :-D

Luckily I'm too picky most of the time. It's probably only roughly one in a hundred women I'd even consider bothering with.
No. 33807
Prevagen commercials are slowly getting more predatory. The executive board of Quincy Biosciences should be sentenced to ten years of hard labor in a Siberian uranium mine.
No. 33808
46 kB, 640 × 963
Today I went to the shop and bought picrelated.
At the counter the cashier had to insert manually the price because she “couldn’t see the article “.
“That’s because it’s a spirit” I said.
Laughs were had and a new 5/10 cashier was added to my list of virtual conquests.
No. 33809
Got any sauce?
You know I actually thought this was a prescription drug at first, which means I am positive a lot of people got scammed that way. How is this even legal? You'd think the FDA would be on their ass about it and apparently the guy already has been accused of fraud

Oh wow they actually already have been on their case
Not sure how FTC has jurisdiction but still. Why is this shit even being tolerated? Who even is benefiting from this that is connected with our politicians and wealthy elite? Are there false or dangerous consumer quackery firms selling "supplements" in bed with our elites? Because at least with them trying to crack down on things like Kratom and vaping I clearly understand the links between big tobacco and big pharma and our political class and why they would be going so hard against these things (largely because they do actually work) but I cannot understand why supplements that are total bullshit get tolerated because I'd imagine they are also in competition with major pharmaceutical corporations who hire and install politicians.
No. 33811
>Got any sauce?

I just saw their new TV ad last night, which begins with the narrator asking the viewer, "concerned about mild memory loss related to aging?" This is what I was referring to: the ads seem to be getting bolder about exploiting the fears of old people who don't know the supplement is useless.
No. 33813
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Got home early and slept for 4 hours. I feel like shit.

I'm now regularly skipping media class because who cares. Though I still report to the teacher before each class that I'm going to leave.
As I was leaving the classroom, I held the door open on the outside to let in the girl, but she gestured me to close it.
We then proceeded to talk for half an hour at the bottom of the stairs.
No idea if we are going anywhere with this.
Though I probably fucked up because I ranted about Americanism and American styled activism financed by American capital that's used to destroy genuine left-wing causes like reduction of work-time and better pay.
So yes, I fucked up.

I picked up a volume of Shakespeare dramas at the library. Never knew we never released these things individually, so the only way to read them is by either using a "student edition" containing the basics on shitty paper, or by taking out a bulky, 1k page edition printed on bible paper.
I opted for the latter, because I hate books with low quality paper.

During history class we re-enacted the workings of the Parliament. I was the prime minister.
The whole time I kept snickering because all those House of Commons banter compilations kept surfacing in my mind.
That, and the Yes Minister theme song.

It feels like I ruin my life every day a bit more.
Currently listening to Palm Mall Mars. I like the "mall sounds" mixed in with pseudo-retro popsongs.
It gives me that crushing feeling of "things changed" that I both hate and love.
Found myself listening a bit more to the sound of the metro during my commute as a result of listening to it yesterday too. It's a strange melody, but sounds true and honest.

That was a nice one. I laughed.
No. 33815 Kontra
Not knowing in and out, heady and bodily restlessness reminds me of this a bit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mj9lQj0I1rs

Also feel like shit as well, the days are draining me, deadlines hover over me everday, poking my mind and I'm pretty much isolated, just trying to hold it all together. What's missing? Love, easily I'd say. Bodily and loving intimacy that tells you that you are not alone, someone is opening their bubble to let you in and share it, melt bublles together. I sometimes wonder how we get passed each other and feel alike, lonely. And I wonder how it could be different and I can't come up with anything...depressing outlooks again. Fucking that time of the year again I guess, even so I was also quite down the whole summer. Winter is ramming its knee in ya back, so just that you notice whats going on. Yeah, know that this track is looping truly you could say, I don't wanna drown, but I'm at it atm.
No. 33817 Kontra
I also saw to Arabs on the bus today.
One had a round face, almost slavic looking, but the other was quite Semitic, with a large, pronounced nose.
The former was a bit stocky, and wore that stereotypical coat that looks a bit like those old soviet military jackets. (As in, the fabric is crudely worked into a coat form, with the stitches still showing, and is stuffed with cotton.)
The other was really thin. Frail looking. He was probably a homosexual, judging from the way he dressed.
Both of the looked quite "westernised" albeit in a different manner. One jumped head first into the lower-class second generation immigrant identity, while the other embraced liberalism.
Neither of them looked like the "unwashed, conquering hordes" people keep talking about. I could've beaten up either of them.
No. 33818
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Late semester stress is really bearing down on me now. A dull dread permeates all waking experience.

I think I would like to try working in a greenhouse.
No. 33822
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The hornyturk genes speak :-DDD

Als ob, it's less upper class women, since most of them just piss me off, and more just capable, stern (for lack of a better term) types. I know I'm not alone there since other Ernsts, including yourself, have expressed similar thoughts in the past too. No qt skinhead grils existing in my city is kind of a crime though, even though it does really benefit me in the avoiding the lizard-brain overpowering the evolved bit.
No. 33823
no qt skinhead girls
No. 33824
78 kB, 400 × 581
You gay son?
No. 33825
It's repulsive
No. 33826
In what way? I genuinely don't see your angle.
No. 33827
Well, you're not a robot. Have a manly and strictly heterosexual pat on the shoulder and go put your benis in that girl you're pining over again.

Or go to your media classes just to interact with people in a classroom setting. Whatever works.

Girls are great tbh. I like looking at their bums and figures.

I sometimes amuse myself on public transportation by looking at women and imagining what they're like in bed.
No. 33829
Because aside from all the obvious reasons being an unironic Nazi is like being an unironic Communist. It's taking valid criticisms of your own system and admitting I'm way too stupid to understand these complex issues so I'm going to pick the edgiest stupidest thing I possibly can as the solution, and one that has already been proven by history to be both stupid and evil. Actually hell I'd even take the unironic Communist because she at least has a better chance of being educated and thus able to overcome herself as being psychologically damaged goods. Things I look for include
There is a 0.02% chance of me finding those qualities in a skinhead girl. There's already basically no chance of me finding that in a genuine unironic Nazi to begin with but with a woman it is even lower. It is like an automatic mark of being a brain damaged trailer meth whore and in all likelihood is probably only a reaction to her older half sister getting knocked up by Dwayne LaTron Tyson and living off welfare which she invariably solves by going full retard in the opposite direction but with more meth and cheap bottom shelf liquor and less weed and heroin. This is one of the few strains of women I feel actually physically repulsed by just thinking about them.
No. 33831
Boneheads arent skins. Never were, and never will be. Rich to throw stones about not understanding things when you misunderstand the most fundamental aspects of skinhead culture in favour of just painting everyone with the brush that the mainstream media gave you.
No. 33833
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I’ve slept a glorious two hours and I’m fucking ready to get through the day talking a bunch of tangentially related bullshit that bores people while also being careless about my opinions.
And yes, I’m going to regret it tomorrow.
No. 33837
ApParently the new Houellebecq novel was just released inAmerica. I might read it. Haven’t checked out any of his other stuff but it sounds interesting.
No. 33838
He's a fine writer. He captures the spirit of our times well. Though I've only read his novel titled Whatever (The English title is irritatingly bad compared to the French, which is Extension of the domain of struggle.)
No. 33839
>the mainstream media gave you
I grew up in a poor rural white area my dude. That depiction of the trailer hoe sisters is accurate I assure you. Besides like I said morality plays a very significant factor into who I date and pretty much by definition a Communist or Nazi is amoral and misguided at best. The added irony is shitting all over their own history and culture amusingly enough at least in the Anglosphere, although Russian neonazis are even more confusing to me. I only just found out that apparently genuine nostalgia for Stalin is a real thing in Russia. I previously thought no actual Russian youth was a genuine Communist although I guess I can at least understand the difference between the feared and globally "respected" Soviet machine which lasted for the better part of a century vs the new young state also poor and ran by gangsters.

There is just nothing appealing to me about it at all. It is everything trashy, uncouth, and immoral about people that I detest and all the more so in a woman. I'm picky. Very picky. And I don't let in just anybody into my personal life, so having...that, share my bed is another layer of revolting.
No. 33846
While heading to a drinking fountain this morning I saw an elderly woman exiting the women's restroom. She was leaning on a walker with both hands and so couldn't hold the heavy door open at the same time. The result was her pushing through the entryway while the door was half-closed and pinching her walker against the doorframe. She seemed to be struggling, and I decided to lean in to hold the door open with one arm while she passed by. Was it awkward? Yes. Could I just stand there while she was fighting with a heavy door? Of course not.
It made me think about how the elderly and disabled must routinely recieve assistance with things, whether they want it or not. Maybe she was grateful for the aid, or maybe she preferred to handle the door by herself, but when someone comes by(me, in this case), that isn't an option. The help will be automatically given, and out of politeness, accepted.
No. 33847 Kontra
You don't know what you're talking about and this is the nth time you've spouted some nonsense before going on a schizo ramble. Go read a book and stop trying to impose your small ignorant experience to everything.

t.North Australia
No. 33848
>Go read a book and stop trying to impose your small ignorant experience to everything.
>discussion about neonazis in USA
>by Australia
There are so many layers
No. 33850 Kontra
you didn't get the jokus
did you?
No. 33854
It's miracolous how much can change in the course of a year. I'm 22 and I can already say that this year was more eventful and meaningful than any of the years before. If you would have asked me one year ago where I would see myself, I couldn't give an answer. My life was a tedious bore before I cut studying. Now every day bears its tasks and responsibilities amd things are going fast. Faster than I like at times. It's like suddenly everything I omitted over the course of the first three years after moving out from home comes to me at once now.
Obviously this is not all good, it also bears a lot of dangers and at the moment I'm so full of stuff to do (without even having a 9 to 5 job or doing a formal education.) that it's almost getting too much.
Not to mention I am dating that girl, which also needs a lot of time and is an intense experience. Things like just spending time and cuddling together, stuff I've never really done before and had already lost hope to experience. Even took on cooking.
Just saying that so the more hopeless among you feel that change is possible after all, even for someone who didn't have any hope in his heart for a long time.
No. 33855
61 kB, 370 × 561
So? You apparently still don't know what a skinhead is beyond the mainstream media's false stereotype of neo-nazi and instead of bothering to educate yourself, you're just doubling down on your ignorance. In fact, you're worse than them because once in a blue moon, they'll even publish an article about what skins actually are to score journalistic brownie points. It's also not just an American skinhead thing if you want to go that route, because SHARP has its origins in the New York scene essentially as a way of trying to counteract the stereotyping and retake the identity from the hijackers and moral panic.

Follow the Brit's advice. Read a book, watch a documentary or something to stop being an ignorant fuck.
No. 33856
Sometimes I think it’s best to have a little distance. My exgf and I were too attached to each other when we finally broke up over normie shit. don’t let women steal your heart, Ernst
No. 33861
915 kB, 1280 × 719
My gf is dealing with lots of stress and I'm trying to get her to chill out, teeth grinding in her sleep etc. She's still in probation at one of those jobs that's more a lifestyle and moved to Britain in the summer so she has a lot on her plate with the grey weather and all.

She doesn't help herself at all though. I had to talk her into taking a sick day but she was still checking her emails and the night after she was struggling to get to sleep because she was worried everyone was going to give her a bollocking for it. A few days back I felt uncomfortable with my life after finding out she was making 3 times what I'm on but fuck all that noise. I get told off for working after about half 5 or checking my emails when I'm off and that's how it should be.

So, like, if I submit Kira from Star Trek would that be viewed as too questionable?
Hard as nails, cold as ice.

>Not to mention I am dating that girl, which also needs a lot of time and is an intense experience. Things like just spending time and cuddling together, stuff I've never really done before and had already lost hope to experience.

I know that feel. Women make life interesting.
No. 33866
So far we were only seeing each other once a week, which I feel isn't too close. I would like to have her around for sure more often but usually there is too much to do and I cannot go to lengths at the moment to spend time with her. 
Last time we saw each other was quite gorgeous. In the morning she picked me up at her school, a friend of hers accompanied us. After we brought her to her hometown we headed to an old castle, where we visited the museum and spent some time hiking through the forest, which was especially beautiful. The landscape really was like in a romanticist novella, the mountains, the deep forest, little caves we entered and stone walls in the distance. Only occasional train sounds distorted the dreamy atmosphere, I said the sounds would come from on old man blowing an alp horn in the distance. Later we had dinner at a restaurant inside the castle, quite high-class with a dessert. This was when I was getting a bit nervous because I brought a rose and autistically wanted to stick to my plan on how and when I'd give it to her but she smelled what I was wanting to do and said to better do aftwwards whatever I was trying to do. After our dinner we enjoyed the nightly view from the castle and I gave her the rose. I then suddenly felt great unreast, it was partly caused by the cold weather as I was shaking at this point and was being too much of tough guy to accept her giving me her wool jacket (for some reason her body always heats up a lot).
Then she suddenly told me that she is going to show me something and we drove close to her hometown, where there lies a massive (massive in terms of a really big lake) hole in the ground, it's used for digging for coal or something but also seems to be a local attraction. Who would have thought, by night the industrial lights made it look like a black sea and we were gazing upon it while I was wearing her wool jacket and held her tightly, caressing her.
We headed back to the car and talked about stuff. It was interesting cause at some point she asked me how I'd describe her and it was really hard to me to do that, while she easily had a lot of good attitudes in line to describe me. Later in the car we cuddled up and I stroked her hair and neck, while the lights of the parking lot were softly flowing into the car she fell asleep close to me. 
Today in the evening (I'm a bit sleepless again) she'll come to my place again and we'll cook some food. It will be fun. Generally we're both quite easy going though for me it got a bit more intense for some reason after our last date. Also we didn't have a kiss yet, other than on her neck or head. It's going really slowly but the last nights I found myself and my thoughts so scattered and drawn to the flesh that I'm feeling the need to take it further today. I want to show her the Preludium to Wagner's Tristan and Isolde in my bed after meal time.
No. 33870
Fucking grab that girl and kiss her
This message has been brought to you by high quality posting
No. 33872
I couldn't fall asleep again though, now that makes exactly 2 hrs of sleep this night. Thing is I'm going to some school event at 9 to write about it, where there will be the education minister of my federal state.
And afterwards I have to go to a special store to get some ingredients for this evening. I'm considering sleeping at least a few hours at afternoon. If I'll be back at at least 1PM I can sleep around 3 hours.
I seriously fucked up my sleeping rhythm. Also just had some fried egg in a tortilla wrap because I was quite hungry, now drinking a lemonade.
No. 33874
>Thing is I'm going to some school event at 9 to write about it, where there will be the education minister of my federal state.

No. 33876
7,7 MB, 1280 × 720, 3:54
I had plans to get a new bed today. Instead I:
  1. Worked with my grandmother on a few thousand-piece jigsaw puzzle painting for 3-4 hours
  2. Attempted a translation of the attached video.
I sometimes wish my passions correlated to things people actually wanted.
No. 33877
I didn't think it would be so hard to find a good journal.

Can Ernst recommend me something from Amazon? I want something with ~300 sheets, and densely lined pages. Ideally under $30.

This is the closest to my ideal that I can find:
But it's only 20 lines per page, and I don't like the kitschy self-help slogan embossed on the cover.
No. 33878 Kontra

She lets you touch you, her hair. etc. I remember my ex told me when on our first date I could have kissed her for the romance, we had a walk after visiting a museum in the afternoon and basically ended up at her place after noon, all the time outside. We sat down on a bench in the park in the evening, talked there for some hours, when it was dark, it began to rain and at some moment she stood up and walked into the rain, I followed her and there we stood, the moment she thought I'd kiss her. I didn't do it tho, only later. And basically from all my other experience, even tho it is few, you can feel it and usually you can sense when the other might be ready, silence and smiling, tension, just get close to her head, she will move away if that is a problem, but she won't I guess so go for it already
No. 33879
God played an incredibly cruel joke on me yesterday.
I was probably sitting in a very bad pose for a few hours, and suddenly breathing started to hurt, and it stayed that way for the rest of the day.
I wasn't dizzy or anything, it just hurt to breathe. Then I wake up today, and it's like nothing happened. Like a bad punchline.
On one hand, it feels like I was close to dying, but on the other, I'm pretty sure that the door to the next stage of existence wasn't nearly as open as I thought it was.

Despite this I finished filling out the last two pages of the notebook I use as a diary. So now I have at least one small volume of legacy.
Then I read another act from MacBeth.
All in all, I slept well.

Yesterday I picked up a few books in the city. A volume of Shakespeare dramas, the collected poetry of Mallarmé, and a German language edition of Knut Hamsun's The Last Chapter.
Mallarmé's work surfaced when me and another student were discussing poetry before literature class with the teacher, because I brought up that the new translation of Dante's Divine Comedy doesn't rhyme, and I was met with the usual derision that "spare me that nonsense, rhyme is just kitsch, just look at the symbolists", to which I eagerly replied that "symbolism is quintessential French nonsense paraded as an achievement"
So, in the end, I got ironically called a nazi again, and I was told to read Mallarmé if I despise the big three symbolists so much.

Today I'm staying home. I'm going to try writing and reading.
No. 33883
348 kB, 1600 × 1200
A picture that someone I follow on Twitter took in Tbilisi

No. 33887
15 kB, 185 × 273
Eating Nappo right now.

A friend who I more or less lost contact with has birthday today. She started taking H last summer. We celebrated her birthday last year and wrote in between because of meetings. I think I was not to fond of it because I don't want to see more suffering from the H, I was always good in soaking up others sufferings, but since the beginning of the year I cannot take it anymore, or more specifically since a friend had a suicide episode. I'm quite and depressive, the others or people who like to cry. Perhaps that would be a treat for me, but I can't, I'm too empty in that regard.

What to do in order to take my thoughts away from that, the bodily feel won't go away anyway.?

Should I read about the 1970/80s change in social structure? Lots of material already on this period in contemporary history, what exactly are events and processes and structural change that takes place in that period? The Condition of the contemporary? Also I'm getting more interested in "long runs" of history, so modernity, continuations from 1850-now e.g.
Should I watch another seminar?
I have to do something for my paper, but I will probably skip thanks to my unmotivated depressive busted ass.

Just eat Nappo and listen to some music.
No. 33889
I remember you like Hofmannsthal which symbolism. Why should symbolism be crap anyway? The problem which translated rhymes is that it can change the Sinn it's always a problem to bring together musicality and semantics in a translation of poetry. You can try to fit both. I remember that there is a non rhyming Baudelaire translation in German, I have a Reclam-Ausgabe in which the Reclam is compared to the famous non-rhyming and the translator did a very good job.
No. 33890
I think I'm going to get my heart checked. Something just doesn't feel right.
Could be the weather or stress, could be a serious issue.

For days now, I've been listening to vaporwave, and feeling like shit.
Strangely enough, the minute I switch to Wagner, I'm able to work on things again.
Completed my book report and my short outline of Shakespeare's works and life.

That's because I'm a careless idiot who fails to hold coherent opinion 60% of the time.
Though it's not even that I dislike rhymeless, poetry, that can be good too. Just look at the Iliad. I can chant that, it's a song basically.
It's probably just my unreasonable, periodically appearing Francophobia and Anglophobia speaking.
At least that's how I try to rationalise it.
No. 33891
>periodically appearing Francophobia and Anglophobia speaking.

might be a good rationalization. I often made the experience that you tell yourself something is crap and then only later on you discover it is not so shitty, at least it goes like that in more complex topics and things for me.
Anyway symbolism spilled all over Europe and to think it is a french thing is a wrong classification IMO, it perhaps kick started there as Paris was the city of the 19th century (to hint to Walter Benjamin here, both in his essay about Paris and the one about Baudelaire, a take on what modernity might be in both cases, tho I only read the one on Baudelaire) and symbolism is very much "modern" in the sense that is a child of modernity, just like romanticism btw.
I mean Symbolism is pretty much a pinnacle of aesthetic language and musicality which you seem to be fond of in my experience, there is no heroic stuff like in the traditional greek myths tho.
I need to look into my notes from a seminar about aesthetic theory 1800-Present, there is a symbolist drama where death sneaks around a house with people inside.
No. 33893
So yeah I'm in my bed no with some vodka and wine. Cooking with the girl was fun and tasty, all seemed to go well until we were in my bed. I carressed her as I usually do when we're alone but then at some time supposedly I got too far and she suddenly pulled her body away from me and sat at the edge of the bed which in return led to me having a breakdown, bursting into tears and shaking. She said she felt a bit pressed by me but it wasn't so bad but I couldn't get myslef together anymore. So I jus tlay there and cried while talking to her and she comforted me. She said she would feel very easily pressed bc of supposedly being almost raped and then shed a tear too.
Finally I accompanied her on the way to her car (we war at my place) and as we parted I had my head lying on her shoulder while she was petting it. I feel completely useless and unable to get any kind of healthy romantic relationship going again. Now I will drink until I fall asleep. See you guys.
No. 33895
>she suddenly pulled her body away from me and sat at the edge of the bed which in return led to me having a breakdown, bursting into tears and shaking.
ec tier
No. 33896
Well what can I say that I'm more and more thouroghly fucked than I thought I was.
No. 33897
Tbh your reaction irritates me. Anyway, if she feels pressured then just wait if you can do that. It was not wrong to make a step further, I mean you couldn't know she was nearly raped and is careful with sexual stuff or whatever line you crossed. Nobody wants to discomfort a girl he likes this way, if you excused yourself she will have believed it I'm sure. You couldn't know it and usually the line is crossed without carving out detailed bio and long lists of what to know and what is appropriate (besides the obvious perhaps), it comes along the way, just like it happened.
No. 33898
EQ is a load of bollocks and inevitably descends into neuroticism about crossing your arms. Then other tools play the game in looking for the cues creating, at best, a vicious cycle of keeping up appearances. There's something to be said of not being a robot but it's about being loosey goosey rather than smiling like a madman because some shyster on TED told you to.

I had to do this stuff for management training today and my response left half the room absolutely seething. Good times even if I had to dick about doing the animal quiz* and was pressured to talk about letting people into my life so we can discover things about myself like they're my girlfriend. Although now that I've typed that, I do get the "I don't feel like I know you" from women.

*https://www.speak-first.com/which-animal-are-you/ I'm a lion, rawr :3
No. 33899
Oh God what a corporate hell. What animal you are? You fucking serious mate? What the hell kind of dumbass company even does that

I've found that perhaps the greatest irony of me deciding to read a few things about Russian Communism the last few weeks is I've bizarrely enough become much more super critical about our dystopian culture and society in the West and under Capitalism perhaps because while expecting to just see lots of weird, nonsensical, arbitrary, dark absurdist comedy shit about the other side of the world all it did was make me increasingly aware of my own. Like, the actual underlayer of indoctrination and unspoken ideology I see that I'm now aware of, selling useless shit for inflated cost to people that don't want it all to say you grew the company by a fraction of a percentage point...ok?

At least I don't really have to put up with personality inventories and that associated bullshit yet anway. To add injury to the insult I just find it incredibly intrusive in addition to being moronic. Like okay I get that you want to use tools that some other company probably convinced you dumbfucks that you needed and paid out the ass for "tools" to enhance "efficiency and profitablity" and basically sold you Lron hubbard pamphlets and cringey group exercises and wish to identify for yourself and help others to identify in themselves strengths and weaknesses. I get that. It's just...sheesh. And besides which I find this a direct invasion of my privacy and thus a direct violation of the NAP.

PsyOp countermeasures are demanded.
No. 33900
Fug. I tell you we need a chatroom at least for cases like this. Just for when you fuck up completel and need some Ernst to talk to.Would be nice.

Yeah, there's more to it than just wht happened. I don't know if you remember what happened before (the mentally ill online girl I chased for roughly one and half year, losing my sanity meanwhile) but regarding that it makes sense. Anyways I got calm now, who gives a shit.
No. 33904
25 kB, 450 × 450
34 kB, 480 × 480
I've had the same problem. Armed with a gift card and standing inside of Michael's in front of 100 journals, I left empty-handed(the inspirational words you mentioned were on most of them). It's one thing to use basic spiral bound notebooks(which I'm currently doing), but settling on The Perfect Journal leaves me in a permanent state of indecision.
Wish I could help, but all I can do is wish you luck. I know we had an Ernst who mentioned buying a really nice notebook a while back. but I believe he made his purchase from a local shop.

>Despite this I finished filling out the last two pages of the notebook I use as a diary. So now I have at least one small volume of legacy.
It's a nice milestone, isn't it? Are you using a basic notebook then, as well?

Rated. I like the slogan for Armenia.

I spent the entire afternoon trying to fix a running toilet. There was a leak in the flush valve, which I confirmed by putting blue dye in the upper tank. Sure enough, blue water slowly made it's way into the bowl.
The easy fix-putting in a new flapper-didn't work. So that meant the upper tank had to be removed and the entire valve replaced. I ended up getting everything back together okay, but am currently running another dye test to see if what I did actually fixed the leak.
Fingers crossed.
No. 33906
I don't know how you put up with that shit. If my job was that invasive I would have been looking for excuses to get fired, not just looking for excuses to quit.
No. 33917
1,9 MB, 2696 × 3459
1,3 MB, 2133 × 3169
It was quite worthwhile to wake up.
I went in, then I was told that almost all of the actual classes I attend are cancelled because they are practising the waltz for prom.
So I decided to go home, but not before losing my brand new scarf.

Then on the tram an old piece of trash berated the entirety of "today's youth" through me, calling me a liberal, Ikea-goer, schools-kipping good for nothing libtard who's at fault for Budapest having a "leftist" mayor.
But the moment she finished her rant, she got off the fucking tram, the spineless hypocrite of a woman! May she be cursed and not live for me to pay her pensions!
Before this, I had an aristocratic contempt for the elderly, but now I outright hate them.
If you were to write hate a thousand times on a piece of paper, it'd not express even a tenth of hatred I feel for the pensioners of this country.

A young gypsy asked me for some change "for a bus ticket". 75 forints.
"Just 75 forints for a ticket my friend! Please"
Fuck the beggars, fuck the Gyspies, fuck the pensioners and fuck this country.
I really should just kill myself, the nation and the people clearly don't need me, and I can't impose my will on them either.
So anyway, I just had some alcohol.

I use a small format notebook with glue binding. Pic related.
Over the years I've found spiral notebooks to be too fragile, as in, either pages start falling out, or the binding somehow gets fucked up.
Though it's not like this one was made to last either, but at least that little textile spine cover is somewhat tasteful. A big bonus imho.

Worst thing is, I have no idea why I have these thoughts appear periodically. But they do.
Don't know where I "caught" this "disease".
Anyway, you mentioned Hofmannstahl yesterday, and today I get a volume of his poems as a gift.
What a coincidence.

I did have time to read some of Mallarmé's poems yesterday, and they were to my liking, especially his collection of small songs titled Chansons bas.
No. 33921
>Anyway, you mentioned Hofmannstahl yesterday, and today I get a volume of his poems as a gift.

Now that I think of it, Hofmannsthal is Austrian afaik. But if I see that right it also has poems of Stefan George? He is kinda controversial in Germany, yet on of the most famous German Symbolist or lets say aestheticist.
No. 33923
Is Krebs a normal German surname
No. 33924
>But if I see that right it also has poems of Stefan George
Yes. It's a lovely 2-in-1 pocket edition made in the 80s.
>controversial in Germany
Over the years I've found this phrase to be meaningless. Anything can be controversial in Germany, because Germany is overcompensating about the 20th century.
You guys should learn to let go a bit.
Really, who cares about controversy? At best it's a fuss over someone having a spine, at worst it just gives publicity to some talentless hack who struck a bullseye with the media's sensitivity.
No. 33930
I got an odd phonecall yesterday, from Estonia. I usually don't answer unknown numbers, especially not late evening, but this time I was already drowsy from my sleep meds.

It was some sort of party, lots of people talking, I could listen for a good minute before they noticed and hang up. What are the chances of someone drunk dialing my number, in fucking Estonia?
No. 33931
It also has the meaning of crab/crayfish, not just cancer.

It's because of his Geheimes Deutschland, nationalism etc. I don't feel guilty but the Third Reich was real and there is a certain responsibility to not let it happen again (in Germany) hence the oversensibility.
No. 33935
Drove to Durham today.
Loads of Chinese also sexy students.
Made me miss living in a city somewhat.
No. 33942
168 kB, 768 × 1129
Update:there are no leaks, and my repair seems to have stopped the endlessly running water. Feels good, man.

Pic of what I'm writing in now.

>Though it's not like this one was made to last either
If you wanted to permanently preserve it, you could always photograph each page and create a pdf. Another option is to simply store the images as a zip file and view them with a comic book/manga reader. That's what I do. I write with a mechanical pencil which tends to smudge over time. My handwriting is pretty bad, and it doesn't take much blurring to make it completely illegible.
No. 33947
Maybe try Moleskine or Leuchtturm1917, both seem to be decent premium mediocre brands (so at least no kitschy slogans afaik)
No. 33948
109 kB, 768 × 1024
No. 33962
>trace DNA of shower semen
>entire male student-body shows up
No. 33971
I ate too much chocolate. Now I feel sick
No. 33974
That's why I try and avoid rich food during summer tbh. It combined with the heat just destroys me.
No. 33985
I got a haircut today.
Whenever I'm forced to get one, I kind of miss my long hair.

All my classes were cancelled because the prom thing is tomorrow, so literally no one bothered to show up.
Now only if we could organise student protests that effectively.
So basically I had a day off. Printed some papers and then I went home and slept.

I always thought that physical things last longer than digital ones, unless you spend a lot of money on backing up things on specially made drives, and while my notebook isn't going to last an eternity, it'll still be there in another 60 or so years, even if I flip through it endlessly.

>I don't feel guilty but the Third Reich was real and there is a certain responsibility to not let it happen again (in Germany) hence the oversensibility.
Okay. That's understandable.
We handled the Holocaust so disgustingly in primary school that I've decided to feel not an ounce of guilt over it afterwards.
They called an activist to hold a lecture, and the bitch talked down to us how we're basically all guilty of the Holocaust, and should feel ashamed.
It's not that I'd commit it again or anything, I'm just wholly apathetic to it on grounds of it being overplayed and overused, oftentimes utilised as a "get out of jail free" card. It's disgusting, and unworthy of such a tragedy.
(Same reason why I hold the opinion that currently no Hungarian has won a Literature-nobel. Winning any of these international prises with a holocaust something is just a cheap cop-out.)
No. 33989
Personal or individual guilt for something that happened decades before one was born is absurd. That is why I talk of responsibility. You could say it's a collective one since our grandparents might took part in it in one way or another. Tbh for Germans it is different. The city I live in had Hakenkreuz decorations all over the place when the Führer came visiting, today you walk by those buildings. I dunno the Hungarian involvements tho. It's just that it should not happen again and ofc it can happen again, so that is why there is a need to not let people slip away.

But then again, I'm not caring much about the concept of nation. There is no Grund in the heideggerian sense to it.
No. 33992
Man, imagine being a nation so powerful that you have to actively hold yourself back from destroying the world, like some kind of shonen anime protagonist.

I wish my country was that important.
No. 33993
Hungarians were complicit in it just as much as Austrians and Slovaks.
No. 33995
>Man, imagine being a nation so powerful that you have to actively hold yourself back from destroying the world, like some kind of shonen anime protagonist.
IQ89 tier reaction to this. That is not why.
No. 33998
30 kB, 220 × 330
oi m8, u got a loicence to spill that seed?
No. 33999 Kontra
It's a joke you waterhead.
No. 34008 Kontra
I’m reasonably sure we didn’t pay money for the Nazies to prioritise deporting and killing our jews like the Slovakian government did.
It all got a tad but out of hand once the Nazies installed a puppet government, but that was no will of the people.
The only people less at fault for this than us are the Poles.
And this is my last word on this historical shitshow.
No. 34039
So apparently a popular reptile account on YouTube that posts weird videos of dangerous live feedings is run by a vore fetishist who had his previous account removed for violating terms of service

God damn I hate those freaks
No. 34061
I gave in to my carnal desires and decided to have a soft drink.
I saw that they had a single bottle of pepsi cherri on the shelves, so picked that to see what it's like. Unusual soft drinks are pretty rare here, we mostly have only the standard stuff.

It's a bit disgusting tbh, tastes more like slightly sour cherry skin than actual cherry. But it's something different at least.

Man, I remember as a kid when soft drinks, chips, trading cards, pogs, video games and all that capitalist good stuff suddenly appeared. Was a nice and carefree time when the main excitement of the day was trying out that new flavor of sour candy, or exchanging your chinese knockoff pokemon pogs for another kid's chinese knockoff mortal kombat pogs.

We'd go home and play some video games, and start bickering with my brother about who gets to be Player 1. Then father would wake up angry, yank the console out ripping the cables, and smash it against the wall in drunken rage. Good times.
No. 34067
>when the main excitement of the day was trying out that new flavor of [X]

sometimes this seems to be the case here even today. As I grow older I have the feeling that at least for the last 5-7 years be get drowned in new flavors concernign supermarket products, crafty stuff e.g but even at your Aldi/Lidl equivalent you get stuff like kiwi/strawberry etc. soft drinks, this also appears to chips and other stuff like yoghurt and whatnot. New varities are a common theme of consumer capitalism ofc but food became a market that was not imagineable in the 90s or earlier I guess. Tho many of this new market is due to the urbanites with some money in their pockets who are out for fancy and exotic, individual stuff. aAso organic and veggie/vegan food.
No. 34069
I bought a houseplant today: aloe vera. I think I will start with easy plants and slowly branch out to more advanced ones.
No. 34071
1,5 MB, 1073 × 802
Yeah I know a few things about this topic. The coolest thing I think I ever did was grow cacti from seeds but sadly they died.

It's actually really not that hard at all for most of them. I think that carnivorous plants, certain aquatic plants, certain ferns and some things like that one palm are mainly the ones that are actually quite difficult to care for and grow well. Most of the rest of them just keep some fertilizer every once in awhile, water them, give them the right amount of sunlight per species, don't keep the majority of them right against a windowsill because depending on species and location they'll burn in the summer and get damaged in the winter, and don't let different types get so waterlogged the roots rot.
No. 34072
So, the prom thing is finally over.
I saved myself a lifetime of embarrassment by only participating in the mandatory ceremony where they gave us a ribbon as a gift for completing HS.
Then I had to sit through 4 hours of "funny" dances.
The "Teacher's dance" was such a high level of aesthetic terror that I'm not sure there's enough time in the world to recover from it.
But judging by the reaction of others, it's clear that I lack a certain dimension of "humanity".
Something makes me overly reserved. Like as if were a protestant.
Everything was bloody tasteless. They failed to pick a proper waltz to dance a waltz to. Ludicrous. Awful.
You plan aesthetics through democracy. There should have been a strong and clear authority figure who should have stepped in and stopped this lunacy.
And as a last fuck you, after the whole ordeal, they played the Blue Danube Waltz. Just as a middle finger to good taste. No, I'm not mad because kitsch triumphed over Shosty's second waltz in the polls. No.

Throughout the whole thing it felt like I was on the verge of losing connection to any sort of existence. I was looking at the thing, and I felt nothing. It was like as if I were ripped out from my own head into reality.
It felt awful.

Though I enjoyed wearing a suit. I enjoy looking nice, generally.
Just had me a glass of champagne with the family. Strangely enough I feel incredibly drunk.
Sadly because the event lasted into the late evening, we couldn't go to a restaurant.
I was looking forward to some good food.
No. 34074
292 kB, 1252 × 1252
>Something makes me overly reserved. Like as if were a protestant.
Damn it motherfucker, my window is open. Don't make me laugh so loud :-DDD
No. 34075
>Most of the rest of them just keep some fertilizer every once in awhile, water them, give them the right amount of sunlight per species, don't keep the majority of them right against a windowsill because depending on species and location they'll burn in the summer and get damaged in the winter, and don't let different types get so waterlogged the roots rot.

Yes, and my understanding is that succulents are the easiest of them all to take care of, so long as you avoid overwatering them and provide an appropriate light regime. In particular, aloe plants can become yellowed and sickly with too much direct sunlight.
No. 34077
I can't decide if Musks Cybertruck while looking at a youtube channel something happened with my mouse and I was directed to the youtube trends is a 90s 3D model becoming reality or a futuristic design that reminds me of the boat the human spare part Ewan McGregor plays in The Island dreams of being on with Johansson. In any case it looks weird. While seeing the thumbnail only I did a google pictire search instead of clicking a video I had to think of Homer Simpsons and the car he realized for his long lost brothers company.

I think I shared my prom story some month ago when you first announced you will attend one.

>But judging by the reaction of others, it's clear that I lack a certain dimension of "humanity"

I know this from weddings as well, dunno why I'm so alienated to these events, probably I'm a flake and live a bit off from the usual trajectory society is proposing to us.

>Throughout the whole thing it felt like I was on the verge of losing connection to any sort of existence. I was looking at the thing, and I felt nothing.

Yeah, only a certain weirdness I guess. I can only relate, since one does not really participate in it, one becomes an observer which means there is a distance. What else can I say? You don't need to feel bad about it, school passed by and once you are out you remember it but it's not really relevant anymore still school makes a good chunk of your life, so it is somehow relevant nevertheless, you won't see many of those people again, some ofc. I still stumble across them occasionally or met them as strangers in the street or at university every once in a while.
No. 34078
74 kB, 700 × 458
Bought a Breezer Doppler Cafe + 2019 bike from a supposed official French dealer except that it was out of stock and he offered me to get some German shit (sorry Germs, I know you make good bikes but this one is shit) for the same price although I can find the German bike for €200 less on Ebay, guy is clearly trying to scam me. My options are breaking his knees which is quick or accepting his offer since PayPal paid him before he sent the bike (which I never received) and it is unusual here, sellers get the money only when they send the stuff you purchased, at least it's how 99% of internet purchases work in France. I opt for breaking his knees.
No. 34079
You're protected with paypal, they'll give your money back (from him).
No. 34081
42 kB, 597 × 497
Have you guys seen this video with the puffer fish eating a carrot yet

No. 34087
>sign in to view
>pewdiepie in first comment
> just came here to watch a pufferfish eat a carrot but i ended up witnessing murder is second comment thread
You have revealed your taste in everything to be awful good sir.

Here is Murphy. He's a Mbu pufferfish. He eats krebs und clams and you can actually hear the big guy crunching through clam shells through the tank. I'd imagine having a fish where you can hear him eating from the next room to be an interesting experience, and one I certainly cannot afford. Apparently their owners are are always nervous about cleaning their tanks because they can get injured super easily while being moved and if you don't move it while cleaning and that fish gets spooked it's between your fingertips and God.
No. 34088
Yes, I've seen it, and it reminds me of
No. 34093
They feed it the carrot so that the chef can better visualize the GI tract while he's preparing the fish. It just so happens that it makes a funny noise when you do this.

Anyway, you forgot to attach your link I think.

I had the same thought lol
No. 34095
You're right I did. I couldve swore I saw the link in my post after I scrolled down. Holy shit what is wrong with me lately
No. 34096
Very neat video. I wonder how much they spend just feeding him every month.
No. 34097
4,3 MB, 1024 × 576, 0:40
The winter weather forces these fuckers into our house, so I set like 6 traps and kill dozens of them in the winter time, but this one wasn't killed by the trap so obviously his neck wasn't broken. I didn't really know how to put him out of his misery so I just hung the trap from an exterior trailer and let this little dude freeze to death.

Fair play to him for resilience, I've killed nearly 50 mice and this was the first to survive the trap
No. 34098
Why are you such a cruel person?
No. 34099
The alternative is bludgeoning the mouse to death inside a bag or something. I don’t think hypothermia is a substantially worse way to go than that. He had to dispatch it somehow.
No. 34102
In the future, put a hammer to its head. It feels really bad when you do it and afterwards as well, but you effectively reduced the suffering of a being and that's a good thing.
No. 34110
Aesthetic decline is the name of the game in the West today. Enjoy your stay.

I do want to note that Shostakovich's 2nd Waltz is only like, half a step up from Blue Danube as far as intellectual pretension points go. If people know one waltz, it's Blue Danube. If they know a second one, it's Shostakovich's 2nd (even if they don't know the name). Definitely better than Blue Danube, but unless they went with an Andre Rieu recording it's not like they chose Kanye West over proper music.

You know, both of those waltzes are only so well known because they appeared in Stanley Kubrick movies. I know you're not a movie guy, but you should see Eyes Wide Shut. It's a pretty good use of Shostakovich for aesthetic purposes, and maybe you've even read the obscure Austrian novella it's based on.
No. 34117
I don't care if both are "basic bitch waltzes".
Could've been On the Hills of Manchuria for all I care, but at least they are proper waltzes. My gripe was with the fact that they didn't even pick a waltz music, so the whole thing had no rhythm at all.
Yes, I'm a bit salty about the Shostakovich thing, but it's really secondary to my sadness that because of the music they picked, the whole thing lacked cohesion and form.
No. 34118
Is it weird that the only reason I even went to my senior formal was because they let you get on the piss even if underage? Ain't no 17 year old me got time for no gay-ass toff dancing.

Or is this whole cultured and responsible thing the norm and my high school was just full of (mulleted) sick cunts?
No. 34125
Here at "prom" we have a formal part where parents and such are present, there is eating and there is speech or talking I don't know since I did not attend that part :DDDD surely food was there and the later part parents are away and algohol is present to fill that parental vacancy :DDD I guess both parts might also have dancing, but one is formal the later informal.it made me cringe to see these people dance to crappy music, same with weddings but tbh if the very same people would have seen me in the club dancing to some repetitive techno chamber belter, they would have felt the same in some eerie way

Diplomas are given out separately, at least at my school that was the case, thank dog.
No. 34126
152 kB, 606 × 392
I didn’t go to prom
No. 34127
26 kB, 270 × 235
Ours was similar except part one was mandatory if you wanted part 2. So I just showed up, sat in the corner and ate roast pork until it was time to go to the next area, sit in the corner and slam beersies for the rest of the night. Was kind of ebin tbh.
No. 34129
I ain't touching that fucker or getting its blood splattered on me, it's vermin who cares. Anyway it froze to death in about an hour I'd say
I caught it at like 4am on my way to bed, I wasn't going rummaging around for shit.
No. 34130
Drinks were verboten and were reserved for the tasteless after-parties they held in clubs on the other side of town, and fuck getting home drunk from the other side of Budapest.
Though they probably enjoyed themselves more than I did, watching Yes Minister while drunk on champagne myself.
I was also surprised that nobody smuggled in any alcohol.
No. 34141
Apparently I'm enough of a grown up that they are going to trust me with a debit card. Cool I guess.
I've always looked with jealousy upon other teenagers who used cards or large banknotes to pay for their meals at fast food places whenever I went to such a place.
Though I think I'm only going to use the card to buy books from abroad.

Otherwise nothing of note happened. I spent the day rotting in front of my computer.
I haven't had any caffeine in a few days now because I was scared shitless that I'm going to die from a heart attack, and it's taking its toll on me now.

Still can't believe I've lost my brand new scarf. Little things like these add up and make me feel bad.
No. 34148
99% of "I'm having a heart attack" moments among people who aren't fat and old are just anxiety. Which unfortunately produces symptoms similar to a heart attack, and only feels more like a heart attack the more anxious you get, which naturally happens if you think you're having a heart attack.

But because there is a 99% probability that you aren't having a heart attack (unless congenital heart problems run in your family, or you know you have one yourself), the best solution is to tell yourself that it's just anxiety, and use that to escape the anxiety reinforcement loop. I'm serious about the symptoms - tingling in the left hand and arm, shortness of breath, chest pain and tightness, regular skipped heartbeats which you can feel in your chest - the whole works. If you expect that you're having a heart attack, it's as if your body reconfigures the anxiety response to what you'd expect from a heart attack.

t; hypochondriac who's been dealing with this shit for ~10 years
No. 34151 Kontra
If it makes it any better, I've always thought that slowly freezing to death would be the best way to go. There's none of the existentially terrifying "here one moment, gone the next" factor. Instead, you just slowly drift away, your mind's ability to panic and worry decreasing as you near the grave. At the end, you even begin to feel warm.

I don't know how much of that can be extended to a rat, but it's not like you tortured it to death or anything.
No. 34153
>No, we should save going to the seaside for the summer. Otherwise we're only going to end up soaked from the cold rain and eating fish and chips like an old couple

So I ended up going to the seaside this weekend with the gf and we got soaked through from the cold rain. When I get back I had to spend 4 hours talking in circles with her drunk housemate about Christmas and all sorts of plans. I moan but I had fun, it's nice to have something to do and I needed to get the alpha housemate on side considering I'm coming over every weekend.

Thing is I've been sitting on my arse all day to recover but she's still out socialising. How do people manage this? As a teenager maybe but I'm all sore and just want to play my games for awhile.

>I ain't touching that fucker or getting its blood splattered on me

Ahh sissy!

But to solve problems it looks like the trap is rusted. The Bompow ones on Amazon are cheap and they send you another batch if you leave a review. They seem to be made in China as well so you know they've been tested on Uighur children.
No. 34161
After days of binge drinking life is even worse than before and I'm running late for work at top of that because someone seemingly jumped in fron of the train.
Everythings going to shit. Starting to lose hope again. Hard to believe that not long ego everything was fine and I was looking forward to the future. Need to somehow get through today's nightshift.
No. 34166
Interesting how Black Friday is turning into a genuine holiday.
The cult of Mammon is enlarging its grasp to almost a whole week now, going hand in hand with the Christmas war-machine.
Fuck me, I'll have to buy something for Christmas for the family.
And for a classmate because we are doing the secret-Santa thing.

Fuck reality.
I'm going to make my own reality by writing something. And I don't care if I'm copying Kafka. Kafka is good.
His skeleton is out in the streets, rattling a danse macabre every day. Kafka is laughing at us!
Rightfully so.

Poland is not yet lost m8.
It's just a bad episode. A filler.
No. 34167
Depressive episode again.
Slight neuropathic buzzing all over the body, some pain in the belly. Bad sleep, mind fog, scattered attention. Slight nausea. Tired but can't fall asleep.

No. 34171
1,2 MB, 3008 × 2000
>ended up going to the seaside this weekend with the gf and we got soaked through from the cold rain.

Neat, wish I had gf to get soaked up from the rain on the British coast. Makes me remember how I went from Hamburg to St. Peter-Ording with my ex by car on a grey day. We more or less randomly stoppped at the Pfahlbauten and walked up close to them. The flood was going on as you can see on the picture and on our way back to the car thru the marshlands the water was so high we got our feet wet and it began to rain. But driving back was super cozy, perhaps we even had good sex later on.
Damn, I miss this kind of stuff in an unhealthy way.

You drank because of that mishap?
You seemed very successful in the last months if I identify you rightly. Try to keep that spirit you had. I know that for a year now I pretty much shut myself off and took no energy in meeting someone new or worked towards something in that regard. I guess I even ditched an opportunity not long ago, not sure why, perhaps I'm afraid of getting intimate while also craving it.
No. 34172
8 kB, 202 × 249
it would be nice to have friends and a girlfriend, but at least I have hobbies. also I am in my early 20s so my body has not really started to decay yet (it will soon however)
No. 34173 Kontra
297 kB, 1280 × 981
Since most of us feel shit again I wanna ditch in with the sunday blues. Another eventless 7 day cycle awaits me.
No. 34178
Seems I'm out of sync, had my depressive episode some weeks ago, also had lots of anxiety because of a presentation at uni, but it ended up going quite well all things considered.

Wish you guys to recover soon and hopefully have a nice start into the week tomorrow!
No. 34184 Kontra
Had a puke in the bathroom.
Nothing came out, but I feel a bit better. My face is snow swollen and purple, and covered in dots from burst capillaries. Being intensely aware of your own flesh is probably the worst experience any living being goes through. All bodily sensation is, on some level, pain. I want to be drip-fed morphine for the rest of my life.

I wonder if I'm genuinely mentally disabled or just a failure as a person.
No. 34191
Yeah, the farce is enjoyable in itself. We went to the arcade and turned £20 into tokens for a bubble gun - I put the soap mix bottle into my coat pocket and that of course leaked out and mixed with the rain until I realised a lovely stream of foam was coming out my pocket.

Maybe this is what you miss as a solo guy. You save buckets of money but there's no chaos.

>Damn, I miss this kind of stuff in an unhealthy way.

Plenty of cock hungry lasses in the world. My view is you have to lower your standards and climb back up after awhile for whatever reason.

Shit sounds fucked. Do you have that flu that is going around? Apparently it is absolutely virulent this year.
No. 34194
Nah, it's the usual physical symptoms of depression + migraine stuff.
The flu is a bit more comfortable experience than this. It also has the benefit of being a socially acceptable way to have your body do disgusting things.
No. 34195
Had a chat with an old punker at the bus stop. Good talk tbh, and without the judgmental bullshit that comes from whitebread suburbanites when they see how I dress.
No. 34203
So the same guy ended up on the bus I was taking home too. So happens that he lives just around the corner from me. Funny how things go.
No. 34207
Apparently these recent bushfires in Australia have destroyed lots of prime koala habitat and killed off substantial shares of formerly robust and healthy populations.

Very sad. That clip of the lady rescuing a singed koala made me feel so bad for them. I think the fact koalas seem kind of stupid and helpless enhances the pathos.
No. 34208
No. 34210
Eh. I know where he lives not the other way around. Tbh, I'd be more concerned about all the wannabe wholesomes around my place. It's way more prime serial killer territory. I've seen them on the bus far more often, and I know for a fact that they've stopped to watch me enter my house. Compared to the shit that they've pulled since I moved here, the washed up punker who yarns about local gigs in the 80s is pretty benign.
No. 34211
There is only one population of koalas that isn't effectively on the slow road to extinction via syphilis, and they're not burning down.

They are kind of autistic though. Their fighting is a good 90% literal screeching at each other about who gets to eat this specific tree that belongs to a species they can't even properly digest.
No. 34218
102 kB, 1500 × 939
Do wake-up light alarm clocks actually work?

'Tis the darkest season and it's hard to get out of bed in the morning. A million different alarms work, so is putting my alarm clock in the bathroom sink, but I still feel like a zombie for hours afterward, wasting my whole morning productive potential. Pic related is 79€ on Black Friday.
No. 34220
When I have trouble getting out of bed in the morning I think about the case of monster zero ultra in the garage.
No. 34221
You could surely make your own for 80e
No. 34222
I thought it was chlamydia
No. 34225
Only ~5 people showed up to class today. Maybe the party was a bit "too hard" or it just simply proved to be too easy of an excuse.
I just had my extra history classes and then simply went home.

We were taught how to write a "long essay" for the matura. It's really not that hard. You just have to use your brain and the sources they give you.
We created an example work together based on a correction sheet.
"What a subtle and cunning sentence that was Ernst, very good", that just felt so nice.

Got a pat on the back and a Bergson volume from the history teacher before going home.
Then I went home.
Bought a frozen pizza and a drink for lunch.

I went to bed after lunch, and I slept. I'm so mad at myself for wasting a whole day on sleeping. It's awful, and I have no one but myself to blame for it.
No. 34227
>Bergson volume

odd but then again cool
Deleuze builds on Bergson[spoiler]

>Plenty of cock hungry lasses in the world.

Don't even doubt it, but I'm not good in making moves on stranger females from university which at least seem to gaze back. Perhaps I could get thru with many tumbling and stupid smalltalk as long as I at least make a move.
No. 34231
Bergson is "important", because his works had a considerable influence on early 20th century Hungarian literature, especially on Mihály Babits's work, who was a leading literary figure at the time.
And it so happens that I'm reading one of his novels right now.
Personally, I haven't heard of Bergson before.
No. 34232
I'm not good with diy.
No. 34233
Ach, I forgot he also wrote literature. Even got a Nobel Prize, no? I thought you got one of his works of philosophy on which Deleuze builds upon e.g. I think it might be the Creative Evolution as central piece of work.
No. 34236
3,1 MB, 1920 × 1080
I can't fucking get anything done, because I had a splitting headache all day.
It's probably from the caffeine withdrawal.
A few weeks back I had an espresso, and it was the best type of coffee I ever had.
I'm currently trying to read the textbook to make a clean version of the text I can use for future reference but I have a hard time concentrating.

I should drink some tea, but I feel a bit hesitant, and it's too late now.
To top it all off, the vodka bottle went missing. It had half a cup's worth of juice sitting in it. I wonder what happened.

At this point I can't keep any order or organisation in the room, I'm just stacking books on top of each other randomly to have any sort of flat space where I can write.
But hey, at least I read 20 pages from a novel.
Truth be told, I have nothing urgent to do, but yet everything feels urgent at the same time.

Well, actually the volume I got was Creative evolution, precisely because of its literary relevance.
No. 34240
Yeah, probably is. Same difference though. Still fucked in tge long run.
No. 34254
I don't understand why Eurasians care about tea so much. I ran out of everything to drink today except water and the tap water tastes weird and bitter even after going through the tap Brita filter so I started making tea. On the one hand I do now kinda see how Europeans and Asians think microwaving isn't right because it just feels kinda slightly wrong or lazy somehow and I don't understand why. Of course on the other hand I still don't get why anyone would care about tea. It is like a shitty inferior and more time consuming beverage to make than coffee in every conceivable way, taste, caffeine content, hassle, even the caffeine itself feels kinda more shitty and jittery somehow and it isn't even as strong. I luckily have night time teas but this has convinced me I need to actually not be lazy and go out to the store tomorrow and pick up something to good to drink like juice, milk, seltzer and maybe even a soda.
No. 34257
247 kB, 500 × 375
That’s very American of you.
Did you have bagged lipton or some actual tea that has a bearable taste without adding sugar or lemon?
Do yourself a favour and go to your loval Adian store and pick up a packet of actual tea, not the bottom of the barrel powder they put in bags.
Fruit/herbal infusion is not tea.
No. 34263
Oh dear god it is so much later than I thought
Well this is surely going to fry my sleep schedule shit
Last one I had was the usual sleepy time herbal tea. And I like the fruity infusion type teas but sadly that is not what I have. Not that it matters anyway because it's way too late for caffeine. I sincerely doubt there is going to be any tea out there that would convince me it's even able to be near coffee let alone stand as equals for the better drink. Plus if I'm going to drink something that's laced in drugs I want it to actually taste strong.
No. 38253 Kontra
Shut up gypsy.
No. 38895
So why is this on page ten.
t; idiota