>>41968>>41967I think hard about what both of you wrote. I don't quite get it, I'm sorry.
>How did university go for you socially?
Not at all, mostly. Pic related is what I never had. Sometimes, someone took pity on me and allowed me to tag along. I walked through the park on my way to uni, and as soon as it was 15°C, it was full of topless dudes playing frisbe or volleyball. I walked by, trying to not look left or right and at least keep an upright posture. I never was able to throw or catch. I was miserably bad at billiards and darts.
I knew a Serbian girl in uni, she used me as a live teddy bear. She always told me about other dudes. One time, she told me
>I really like X. He told me how he fucks another girl every week. He goes to $club, and he stays until they close. Then, he blocks a hot girls way so she has to talk to him, and then he has sex with her. He's so ***honest***
another time, she told me
>I dreamt I slept with X. I had an orgasm in my sleep. When I woke up, my panties were all wet.
One time, she undressed in my pressence. Then, she turned around and said
>Oh, I forgot you are men.
(leaving out the article, slav-style.)
How was that supposed to make me feel? Did she torture me out of stupidity or just for the fun of it?
One night, we went out together, we had fun, etc. Our friendship ended when one night, she slept at my place and I took up all my courage and pressed her hand against my cheek. She just said 'let's sleep'. Things never were the same.
I had a gf once, after I got a job and a flat. I though maybe I wasn't such a loser after all, so I tried. All was well in the beginning. Then she expected me to get a better job that paid more and a better flat, and she expected me to work wonders. Like, she looked over my shoulder when I worked from home on a Sunday and basically expected that I would create market-ready software all alone, in one afternoon. No joke. The precondition to our relationship was that I was superman.
She constantly told me about her first boyfriend, how great he was, how good it was that they were still friends, and how awesome their recent trip together to a European capital had been. I read between the lines that he had cheated on her, and more than once, then dumped her. She told me how much money he made in his side-business breeding fish and so on. I tolerated all of that, I tried to be patient, understanding, I listened to her. Then she dumped me. I wasn't good enough for her. Now, she won't even let me talk to her.
What am I supposed to think? I'm not good enough and never will be. If she expected me to be able to improve enough, she wouldn't have cut off all contact. She decided I'm shit and always will be, and she's probably right. It was years ago and still, she won't talk to me. I wish I could do time travel and visit myself at 3 years of age. I'd beat the living shit out of myself and force myself to improve. To do great at school, to become the best at everything, and to win, win, win and never lose. I'd beat myself within inches of my live for ever losing. God, would I beat the little shit. I'd knock all his teeth out.
>>41968>>41967I think hard about what both of you wrote. I don't quite get it, I'm sorry.
>How did university go for you socially?
Not at all, mostly. Pic related is what I never had. Sometimes, someone took pity on me and allowed me to tag along. I walked through the park on my way to uni, and as soon as it was 15°C, it was full of topless dudes playing frisbe or volleyball. I walked by, trying to not look left or right and at least keep an upright posture. I never was able to throw or catch. I was miserably bad at billiards and darts.
I knew a Serbian girl in uni, she used me as a live teddy bear. She always told me about other dudes. One time, she told me
>I really like X. He told me how he fucks another girl every week. He goes to $club, and he stays until they close. Then, he blocks a hot girls way so she has to talk to him, and then he has sex with her. He's so ***honest***
another time, she told me
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