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I'm afraid of trying anything since childhood because I'm constantly reminiscing too much about what other people would and had felt as consequence of my actions.
I'm a piece of shit. Years ago whilst being timid about myself and such I could have done something with my free time and youthfulness; energy.
Everyday before going to bed I wish silently that I could go back through time and just put one thing in my young mind: no one cares about you, you don't need to be protective.
Instead, I'm here --- wasted!